Breaking News - Gekko Shot by sniper / Gekko Tiroteado por Francotirador
October 27 - SD News:
An obscure Internet service first reported this morning that the hugely popular and saintly Gekko was shot in cold blood this morning by the infamous sniper assassin known as "Mr. K", who is also responsible for the untimely death of the beloved Paul the Octopus.
Gekko was reportedly preaching his revolutionary "Just Get Talking" doctrine to a sizable group of acolytes, when the shots were made from a neighboring building.
A witness who had been sleeping in the room next door to where the dastardly sniper fired the shots, reports having heard cries of "So you don't like cats, do you? Take THIS, greenie!",and then manical laughter followed by the sounds of shots being fired.
Although his students and sympathizers acted quickly and rushed him to the hospital, rumor has it that the beloved figure did not survive the cowardly attack.
A grim-faced doctor at the Spanglican General Hospital would only comment: "Doesn't look good, now please let us work".
No other suspects have been named at this point. However, further investigation has shown that some resentment had been boiling against His Geckoness of late.
A New Zealander woman who spoke from the site of the hospital on condition of anonymity declared: "I used to think he was a dag, you know. But lately he was starting to get stroppy - almost knavish I would say. I know it sounds shocking, but maybe he wasn't all that he pretended to be".
Nearby an elderly gentleman, also speaking on condition of anonymity offered: " I had him in high esteem, and always figured that he was all right. But recently he publicly affronted me, comparing me with an old turtle! Would you believe that?"
Worldwide reaction was swift, although not always favorable to His Geckoness. President Obama declared from the White House: "Bummer Dude! That just ain't right!". Russian President Medvedev said: "He was a hoot to have around. I hope they catch that horrible cat soon!". However, President Hugo Chávez from Venezuela declared: "Eso es lo que le pasa a los pitiyankis por estarse metiendo en los asuntos de los demás! Hasta la Victoria Siempre!".
Meanwhile Mr. K is known to be at large, and the Grammar Police have placed road blocks on strategic locations to try and catch the assassin. "We're stopping anyone that we detect using subject pronouns", declared Colonel H. Klum, "on the grounds that anyone capable of such behavior is likely to be related to this shady character."
SD News will issue news bulletins as information becomes available.
27 de Octubre - SD News:
Un servicio de internet poco conocido fue el primero en reportar esta mañana que el santo y enormememente popular Gekko fue tiroteado a sangre fría esta mañana por el infame asesino francotirador conocido como "Mr. K", a quien también se responsabiliza de la muerte prematura del muy querido Pulpo Paul.
Se reporta que Gekko estaba predicando su revolucionaria doctrina "Simplemente Habla" a un nutrido grupo de acólitos, cuando se hicieron los disparos desde un edificio cercano.
Un testigo que se encontraba durmiendo en el cuarto vecino a aquél desde donde el malvado francotirador hizo los disparos, reporta haber escuchado gritos de: "Así que no te gustan los gatos, eh? Toma ESTO verdecito!", seguido de una risa enloquecida, y luego el sonido de los disparos.
Aunque sus estudiantes y simpatizantes actuaron rápidamente y lo llevaron de inmediato al hospital, los rumores indican que la amada figure no ha sobrevivido al ataque cobarde
Un médico del Hospital General Spanglicano sólo comentó con expresión sombría: "No se ve bien, ahora por favor déjennos trabajar".
No se ha nombrado a ningún otro sospechoso hasta el momento. No obstante, investigaciones adicionales indican que últimamente se había estado acumulando un cierto resentimeinto contra su Geckidad.
Una mujer neozelandesa que habló desde la localidad del hospital en condición de anonimato declaró: "Yo pensaba que él era más bien chistoso, sabes? Pero últimamente había comenzado a ponerse malhumorado - con un compotamiento casi bellaco, diría yo. Sé que suena chocante, pero tal vez él no era todo lo que aparentaba ser".
Cerca de ella, un hombre mayor, hablando también en condición de anonimato dijo: "siempre lo tuve en alta estima, y siempre pensé que era una buena persona. Pero recientemente me afrontó públicamente al compararme con una vieja tortuga. Puedes creerlo?"
A nivel mundial la reacción fue rápida, aunque no siempre favorable hacia Su Gekkidad. El Presidente Obama declaró desde la Casa Blanca: "¡Diantre, Mano! ¡Eso no está bien!". El Presidente Ruso Medvedev dijo: "Era de lo más divertido tenerlo cerca. ¡Espero que atrapen a ese espantoso gato pronto!".
Sin embargo, el Presidente Hugo Chávez deVenezuela declaró: "Eso es lo que le pasa a los pitiyankis por estarse metiendo en los asuntos de los demás! Hasta la Victoria Siempre!".
Mientras tanto, se sabe que Mr. K anda suelto, y la Policía de la Gramática ha colocado bloques en calles estratégicamente localizadas, para intentar atrapar al asesino. "Estamos deteniendo a cualquiera que detectemos utilizando pronombres personales", declaró la Coronel H. Klum, "basados en que cualquiera que sea capaz de semejante comportamiento, es posible que esté relacionado con este oscuro personaje."
SD News emitirá nuevo boletines en la medida que la información se haga disponible.
13 Answers
I would like to help! I hope it is not to late. I sent this first class mail!
Noticias de último minuto! Breaking News!
Se ha sido confirmado que Geco ha sobrevivido.
It has been confirmed that Gecko has survived.
Fue tocar e ir al principio.
It was touch and go at first.
Pero Geco ha estado visto vivo y bien y de buen humor.
But Gecko has been seen alive and well and in good spirits.
Él no ha perdido tiempo planeando su venganza.
He has wasted no time plotting his revenge.
Tiene muchas ideas para dominar el mundo y la humillación del gato.
He has many ideas for world domination and cat humiliation.
Gecos (ie. salamanquesas) de todo el mundo se han pronunciado a favor.
Geckos from around the world have come out in support.
Convirtiendo Gecko, nuestro amante de la paz en una máquina de combate.
Turning our peace loving Gecko into a fighting machine.
Antes / Before
Despues / After (Gecko aka Dave)
Los gatos en todas partes ¡viven en el miedo!
Cats everywhere are living in fear!
Les mantendremos informados sobre cualquieres nuevos desarrollos.
We shall keep you updated as to any new developments.
BREAKING NEWS
Chicago(CP)--After a lengthly, exhaustive, twenty minute investigation it can now be reported that the attempted assasination of the SpanishDict Gekko was nothing more than a shameless publicity stunt.
Under police questioning, the Gekk's publicist, Kitty Kat, admitted that the slimy reptile feared that his populatrity was flagging and employed her nephew, Tom Garfield, known in former press accounts as "Mr. K.", to take pot shots at the fading star.
Gekko publicist Kitty Kat, shortly before her arrest.
It did not take police long to unravel this yarn. "He hadn't paid my salary for weeks," howled Ms. Kat as she was led away, "The cheapskate told me that if I didn't do this that I'd never get paid."
Garfield confirmed the story. "He had sent me a $5,000 check hidden in a box of cat-nip, but his check bounced and the cat-nip was only oregano."
Tom Garfield (file photo)
Gekko's ex-wife was reached earlier today for comment, but stated only, "As long as that chippie from New Zealand is waiting for him, you won't see me waiting outside of the mine to see if he makes it out alive."
An a.p.b. has been issued for the limelight-loving lizard, who is believed to have fled to Puerto Rico to evade capture.
The cat is pleading the 5th. The cat is innocent. That is the story and he is sticking to it. 
)
Here's hoping His Geckoness is on the mend soon...
¡Me pongo inmediatamente mi traje de lagartija!
En tu honor:
.
A local paparazzi sold this image of Gekko's foot shortly after the attack.
Uno de los miembros locales de los paparazzi vendido esta imagen del pie de Gekko, poco después del ataque.
Ofrezco esta pequeña ambulancia para ayudar a llevar Gekko al hospital para recibir tratamiento.
I offer this small ambulance to help bring gekko to the hospital for treatment.
Mr. K would like to report that he has gone into hiding. He has found a safe haven with other accused cat felons and will remain in hiding until such time as he deems fit to resurface.
¡Vaya número!
total, porque es un hombre verde...tse tse tse
Y según lo que tengo entendido, ha provocado una serie de crisis de angustia en toda la comunidad gekkoviana. El lagarto de al lado me asegura que la alcantarilla está repleta de gekkos buscando refugio por si acaso ese infame Sr. K ande buscando pleitos con los familiares del posiblemente ya occiso...
Representa una crisis en grande para toda la comunidad reptiliana...
¡Por Dios, No! ¡Le ayuda este momento! jejejeje Eso muy gracioso, chico.
¡Genial! Pero eso no es suficiente... ¡fenomenal! Muy, muy gracioso y bien escrito 
