Favourite comebacks

Question

What are your favourite comebacks when someone insults you?

"Favourite" is actually spelled as "Favorite" ;-) - Destroyed99, May 24, 2011

Johanna, you must be a Yank. favourite is in my dictionary as British English spelling. - 0074b507, May 24, 2011

I hope you looked at my profile before calling me a bl**dy Yank Qfreed! Watch what you call people MATE. - Destroyed99, May 24, 2011

Australian|American...................favourite|favorite..........There is two types. You can say it like that if you want. - Destroyed99, May 24, 2011

Where I'm from we spell it favourite - spanish-at-heart, Oct 27, 2011

Answer 1

Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if you were my husband, I'd poison your tea.

Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.

- Winston Churchill

Ha! Funny :D - Goldie_Miel, May 24, 2011

Winnie provided a very rich body of brilliant quips. - samdie, Oct 27, 2011

Answer 2

These are some I found on the internet:

-Im busy now, can I ignore you some other time?

-Keep talking,you will say something smart one day.I belive in you!

-Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

-Go ahead tell them what you know it will only take 10 seconds!

-Ordinary people live and learn ,you just live.

-I bet your brain feels brand new seeing that you have never used it.

-I will never forget the day we met.But I will keep trying.

-I bet you were up all night thinking of that one.So I wont disapoint you I will pretend it worked.

-You are a good example of why some animals eat their young

-I'd slap you ,but I dont want to make your face look any better.

-I think you mixed me up with someone who cares.

muy sarcástico! - Lector_Constante, May 24, 2011

hola Aganerd :) ¿qué tal? - Kiwi-Girl, May 24, 2011

Answer 3

Tina Turner's in 1984 and the Boston Red Sox's in 2004.

jajajajaja, te voto chico - Jason7R, May 24, 2011

Very original, Tom. - NancyGrace, May 24, 2011

Jejeje! - Oramasdude, May 24, 2011

Are these the types of "comebacks" being asked for? - ian-hill, Oct 27, 2011

Answer 4

--- Tu lo serás

---- ¿Qué más, te dicen?

----- (Ah, ese es tu nombre,).. ¿y tu apellido?

------ El que lo dice, lo es

Answer 5

Another Winston Churchill. Mujer en la calle: "Señor, usted está borracho- muy, muy borracho". Churchill: " Señora, usted es fea- muy, muy fea. En la mañana, voy a estar sobrio".

Ja, Ja, Ja... Buenísimo.... Churchill was the man!!! - nelson_rafael, Jun 6, 2011

Answer 6

It would depend on the context of the insult.

Answer 7

I would say, "Why, thank you!" As St. Paul says, thank your enemy and in that way heap hot coals on his head ...

Hmm. Implies a certain lack of "charity". - samdie, Oct 27, 2011

Answer 8

My favourite is, "Your mom!" It's one of those classics that never gets old and is instantly understood, no matter what the insult was.

Answer 9

I am rubber ,you are glue.Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.

Answer 10

Pretend that I didn't ''get it''.

Answer 11

I don't know about a comeback on insults but if someone is trying to pressurise me into agreeing with them then I simply say,

If I were to agree with you then we would both be wrong.

Answer 12

I am rubber ,you are glue.Whatever you say bounces off me and sticks to you.

Kids here in Mexico used to say:

Carcacha, carcacha todo lo que me digas se te retacha.

Botellita de jerez, todo lo que me digas será al revés.

Answer 13

A common one here is "so is your face" but I only ever use it sarastically

Answer 14

I made this picture a while ago, I wondered when it would come in handy!

I found the quote from - Adeline Yen Mah - Destroyed99, May 24, 2011

Answer 15

¡Yo soy goma, tu eres cola!

No seriously cola means glue there, although I prefer pegamento. I wonder how cola differs from pegamento there.

Gracias.