Translation Exercise for Beginners: Number 10

12
votes

This is a thread specifically designed with beginners in mind. If other exercises intimidate you this one shouldn't! Keep in mind that it doesn't matter if you don't get it all right. The actual process of attempting translation, and then correcting yourself is what helps us learn!

There are three rules:

  • Don't look at other people's translations until you have made your own.
  • Do not use a translation engine. (Although you can use a dictionary)
  • Do vote for the best answers and this thread. If there is a tie, votes make a difference.

So here is our sentence for Number 10:

"Los hombres son como los astros, que unos dan luz de sí y otros brillan con la que reciben."

José Martí

Please remember to answer and then vote! This helps our thread and helps to choose a winner because if there is a word-for-word tie the answer with the most votes wins! The winner automatically recieves 20 reputation points not counting any votes he/she may have garnered. Every participant receives a vote from me as well for participating. Keep in mind that if you need some time to come up with an answer and the thread disappears you can find it under the category: Games and Challenges. Have fun! The translation will be posted on Wednesday.

6064 views
updated ABR 21, 2010
posted by renaerules

20 Answers

7
votes

Men are like stars, some give light and others shine through what they're given.

updated FEB 25, 2010
posted by CrazyDiamond
Congatulations CrazyDiamond! I liked how you decided to capture the essence of the sentence with "shine through". You managed to translate faithfully while making creative word choices. I fell you tied with a few others for first
But the votes are in your favor! Those creative word choices can really garner votes. Hope to see you in the next thread!
Well done Crazy! :-)
Why, thank you. :) The literal translation didn't sound quite right to my ears, so I went with something I thought sounded a little smoother. Nice to know I hit the mark.
6
votes

"Los hombres son como los astros, que unos dan luz de sí y otros brillan con la que reciben."

Men are like the heavens, some give light and others are are lit by the light they receive.

updated FEB 25, 2010
posted by 00d7cd75
Very good job, Ken! You are tied for most votes as well. If you had specified heavenly bodies best answer would have gone to you. "astros" can mean heavenly bodies or stars for this exercise heavens was a little too broad as some of the meaning is lost
Thank you, Rena. I realized my mistake but felt it would be cheating to change it. :-/
5
votes

Men are like stars in that some give light and the others shine with the light they receive.

updated FEB 28, 2010
posted by florence93
Good straightforward translation. Play with words a little more and don't use the unecessary words like "in that"! Very good.
hi renaerules!.. thanks for the suggestion...
5
votes

"Men are like stars: some give their own light and others reflect what they receive."
--Jose Marti

(I interpreted "brillan con" as "shine with" or "reflect" - not sure this is correct.)

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by LaBurra
Excellent job Lisbeth! I liked how you understood the nuance of the sentence and tried to capture that. I think you will find the answer to how to capture reflect without using the word from the translation posted. You caught the essence!
You tied for first in my book...and then there are the votes!
5
votes

My attempt is:

Men are like the stars, in that some give light and others shine with what they receive.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by alice_m
Very good straightforward translation. "in that" are unecessary words not needed. I would have liked to see you play around with synonyms a little. You are definitly doing well for admitting this sentence was a challenge. See you in the next exercise?
4
votes

Men are like stars, some give light and some reflect what they receive.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by jneecie
Very nice...all you need to do is get a little creative with synonyms and capture the meaning of the sentence. Make it your own!
4
votes

"Los hombres son como los astros, que unos dan luz de sí y otros brillan con la que reciben."

José Martí

Men are like the stars, some give light to themselves and others shine to what they receive

José Martí

I've tried my best, but this sentence doesn't make any sense lol.

I think it should be "Exercise for upper Beginners"....?

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by Alrisaera
I agree - I had a lot of trouble with the last part of the sentence!
For admitting that you had a hard time with this sentence you did an amazing job! Reas everyone elses translations and comments and then the posted translation from me. Next time you will do well!
3
votes

Men are like stars and planets, some give their own light and others shine with the light they receive.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by jaimecole
Beautiful! You have the meaning all in a little nutshell. In this case the only thing you lack are the votes. In my opinion you tied for first with a few others. Since you did so well with this try using stronger word choices!
Thanks for the advice! :)
3
votes

The men are like the stars, some give there own light and others bright with the light they recieve.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by 0021954c
Very good! I would change "others bright".
3
votes

Men are like heavenly bodies in that some emit light while others reflect light they receive.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by Don-Linton
Awesome job! Taht's pretty much it in a nutshell. I need stronger word choices from you next time. In my book you tied for second with a couple others!
3
votes

Los hombres son como los astros, que unos dan luz de sí y otros brillan con la que reciben.

Men are like the heavens, some give light off and others shine from what they are given..

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by yogamamaof2
Very good job! I need "heavens" to be a little more specific...heavenly bodies perhaps? In this case with just "heavens" it seems to lose a little bit of the meaning.
3
votes

Men are like the stars in that some give light and others shine with what they receive.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by fatchocobo
Nice! Great translation, you have a couple unecessary words in there that make it muddy..."in that"
3
votes

Men are as the stars, some extend their light and others shine with what they recieve.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by teresa3101
Very good! I like your attempt, but extend??? I would guess there may be a word out there truer to the translation.
2
votes

This is great. Señor Martí skillfully used "astros" which could be 'stars' or 'planets', basically any heavenly body. I think quite a few entries here express his thoughts well. I'd like to try also:

Some men are like stars that shine from within, and others are like planets that light up by reflecting such light.

This would be my interpretation if he was referring to two positive types of people. I'm actually not sure that he is doing so. He may be making a negative comment on some kind of people. If so, then I would say:

Some men are like stars that shine from within, but some men can only glow from the light of others.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by chaparrito
Hi, chaparrito, that's exactly why I chose this sentence. Marti was masterful with his word choice. He seemed to leave it open to each individuals perception on the subject didn't he?
Unfortunately, this is a beginners thread so you posted already handicapped! Feel free to post comment's or attempt translations in my threads, but they will have to be truly masterful for them to be accepted!
I really did enjoy your comments though!
I did it just for fun. Thanks for the challenge. :-)
2
votes

"Los hombres son como los astros, que unos dan luz de sí y otros brillan con la que reciben."

My version will be:

Men are like stars,some of them give light and the others shine when they recieve it.

updated FEB 24, 2010
posted by neslita
Nice job! Very straightforward. You have the meaning down, now play with sentence structure and wording to capture it!