Translation For a Video English to Spanish

Question

This is a response to someone who asked for the text to an English video of another person, if anyone can help me make more sense of this please do.

Forgive me for mistakes and etc, I had to write this up in a hurry because I need to leave in a few minutes, I hope this makes enough sense. The Spanish version is an approximation since I don't know enough to give exact translations over.

*Hello Nico, I am learning spanish, but I believe that I can help you.

There is no such thing as death, ok I said it, I put it out there. All these alleged corpses out there they're not really corpses, they're zombies. One theory about why the zombies remain immobile is that they are just incredibly lazy. They figure "I could move around, I could terrorize the living, I could cause a zombie apocalypse, but that sounds like too much work, I'm just going to sit still and hope no one notices me. The other theory is that they are just biding their time they are waiting for the right moment to be like blaaar, tricked you mofoes, so when you're in your mom's hospital bed goign aww, and then you know you see her flat line, don't lean in for that last final hug, because she's already gone zombie man, that could be the moment when the zombies decide, alright, now is the time, and you might wind up with a face full of Fing zombie teeth and mommies like. That is so Fing dark,

Peace.*

Hola Nico, estoy aprender español, pero creo que te puedo ayudar.

No hay tal cosa como muerte. OK? lo dije. Lo pongo allí. ÿstos alegado cadáveres fuera allí, no estan realmente cadáveres, estan zombis. Uno teoría sobre porque los zombis permanecen inmóvil lo es que son sólo más perezoso.

Tú sabes? Piensen 'estoy muerto, movería o asustar lo viven y causar el apocalipsis zombie. Pero que suena como demasiado (málo palabra = Fu'') trabajar.?
Estoy sólo sentarse calma y espero que nadie me vea.

El otra teoría sin embargo es que están tomando sus vez. Están esperando por el momento adecuado estar como 'BlAAAHOORAR engañado a todos.? Cuándo a el cama a tu madre y ella esta morir. Y entonces oiga línea plana no inclínese en para el ultimo abrazo porque ella ha ya ir 'zombi,? hombre. Que estaría el exacto momento cuando los zombis deciden ahora es el vez. Y tu tiene una cara llena de dientes zombi. Y madre es como 'roooarrr.? Tan (malo palabra = fu''ing) oscuridad.

Paz.

Answer 1

Thanks everyone, that gerund kills me sometimes because I keep thinking it has to be used only when you are actually currently at the moment doing the action.

Anyway, in case you were wondering, I sent my original text to the person before I had the chance to add the corrections, and they said they understood the gist of it, which I suppose is good, considering I apparently mangled the translation so bad.

Interestingly this bit of correction "sentarme" just made something click in my head. Muchos Gracias todos.

Answer 2

Hola Nico, estoy aprendiendo español, pero creo que te puedo ayudar.

No hay tal cosa como ** la** muerte. ¿OK? Lo dije. Lo pongo allí. Estos cadáveres alegados que nos rodean, no son **realmente cadáveres, **son zombis. Una teoría sobre por qué los zombis permanecen inmóviles es que sólo son más perezosos [que lo demás].

Tú sabes? Piensen que 'estoy muerto, pero que podría moverme o podría asustar a **los que viven y **podría **causar el apocalipsis zombie, pero esto suena como demasiado trabajo **(málo palabra = Fu''). ?

Voy a sentarme quieto y esperar que nadie me vea.

La otra teoría, sin embargo, es que están esperando el tiempo oportuno.

Paz.

I give up.

Quentin, te has superado a ti mismo

Answer 3

*Hello Nico, I am learning spanish, but I believe that I can help you.

There is no such thing as death, ok I said it, I put it out there. All these alleged corpses out there they're not really corpses, they're zombies. One theory about why the zombies remain immobile is that they are just incredibly lazy. They figure "I could move around, I could terrorize the living, I could cause a zombie apocalypse, but that sounds like too much work, I'm just going to sit still and hope no one notices me. The other theory is that they are just biding their time they are waiting for the right moment to be like blaaar, tricked you mofoes, so when you're in your mom's hospital bed goign aww, and then you know you see her flat line, don't lean in for that last final hug, because she's already gone zombie man, that could be the moment when the zombies decide, alright, now is the time, and you might wind up with a face full of Fing zombie teeth and mommies like. That is so Fing dark,

Peace.*

Hola Nico, estoy aprendiendo español, pero creo que te puedo ayudar.

No hay tal cosa como ** la** muerte. ¿OK? Lo dije. Lo pongo allí. Estos cadáveres alegados que nos rodean, no son **realmente cadáveres, **son zombis. Una teoría sobre por qué los zombis permanecen inmóvil es que sólo son más perezosos [que lo demás].

Tú sabes? Piensen que 'estoy muerto, podría mover o podría asustar a **los que viven y **podría **causar el apocalipsis zombie, pero esto suena como demasiado trabajo **(málo palabra = Fu''). ?

Voy a sentarme quieto y esperar que nadie me vea.

La otra teoría, sin embargo, es que están esperando el tiempo oportuno.

Paz.

I give up. A word for word translation isn't going to help you. A Spanish speaking person would never express these concepts in this manner. You can't say "put it out there", for example, by translating word for word into Spanish. To correct your work would entail re-writing most of your text. I'll leave that to a native who is more familiar with the requisite idioms.