HomeQ&AJust for fun: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Just for fun: Why did the chicken cross the road?

16
votes

You might want to offer your own version of

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Either in English or in Spanish smile

I have a few answers to offer. I think I will go with ....HOMER'S!! :lol.:

QUESTION: WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD'

KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side.

PLATO: For the greater good.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads.
KARL MARX: It was a historical inevitability.

TIMOTHY LEARY: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let it take.

SADDAM HUSSEIN: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN: I forget.

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

HIPPOCRATES: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.

ANDERSEN CONSULTING: Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Andersen helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to tachieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across thecontinuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

LOUIS FARRAKHAN: The road, you see, represents the black man. The chicken 'crossed' the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.: I envision a world where all chickens will be free of cross roads without having their motives called into question.

MOSES: And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
FOX MULDER: You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross the road before you believe it?
RICHARD M. NIXON: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

MACHIAVELLI: The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.

JERRY SEINFELD: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway'"

FREUD: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbooks. Of course, you also have to purchase Microsoft Road.

OLIVER STONE: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road'" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing'"

DARWIN: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically disposed to cross roads.

EINSTEIN: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
BUDDHA: Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.

RALPH WALDO EMERSON: The chicken did not cross the road .. it transcended it.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die. In the rain.

MICHAEL SCHUMACHER: It was an instictive maneuver, the chicken obviously didn't see the road until he had already started to cross.

HOMER SIMPSON: Mmmmmm.....chicken....

16013 views
updated ABR 8, 2011
posted by 00494d19
Because it saw Colnel Saunders coming. - kenwilliams, SEP 3, 2009
Oh that is funny! - Brynleigh, JUL 10, 2010
HIllarious!!!! :) - primus, JUL 10, 2010
To get away from the rooster / cockerel. - ian-hill, ABR 7, 2011

32 Answers

6
votes

Dr. Seuss : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed it, I've not been told!

Emily Dickinson : Because it could not stop for death.

Ernest Hemingway : To die. In the rain.

Henry David Thoreau : To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life.

Mark Twain : The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Ralph Waldo Emerson : It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Robert Frost : To reach the sidewalk less travelled by.

William Shakespeare : I don't know why, but methinks I could rattle off a hundred-line soliloquy without much ado

George Orwell : Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

updated JUL 10, 2010
posted by piewackat
How amusing this all is! - Nise, JUL 10, 2010
4
votes

Bob Dylan : How many roads must one chicken cross?

Colonel Sanders : I missed one?

O.J. : It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.

Mae West : I invited it to come up and see me sometime.

Zsa Zsa Gabor : It probably crossed to get a better look at my legs, which, thank goodness, are good, dahling.

L.A. Police Department : Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Grandpa : In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

Bill the Cat : Oops... It was delicious.

updated ABR 8, 2011
edited by sanlee
posted by sanlee
I like the cat one the best. - sanlee, JUL 10, 2010
4
votes

A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs. He asked the farmer, "What's up with these chickens'" The farmer said "Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three-legged bird. I'm going to be a millionaire." The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, "Don't know, haven't caught one yet."

updated JUL 10, 2010
posted by 00b83c38
that's a good one:)LOL - Brynleigh, JUL 10, 2010
ha,ha.ha.thanks:) - Silvia, JUL 10, 2010
3
votes

¿Por qué el pollo cruzó la calle? Para comprobar que no era gallina!

Why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he wasn't a coward(chicken)!

updated ABR 8, 2011
edited by 002262dd
posted by 002262dd
I like this version, funny :) - Silvia, JUL 10, 2010
3
votes

Very good Hiedi. Does any one know the name of this chicken? The use of THE (definite article)chicken indicates either it was a well known chicken or the ONLY chicken. I have no idea which.

updated ABR 8, 2011
edited by ian-hill
posted by ian-hill
2
votes

becuase GM went broke and there was less cars on the road to threaten its life.

updated ABR 8, 2011
posted by Crazy1
jajajajajGood one:) - Brynleigh, JUL 10, 2010
jeje... que bueno - DJ_Huero, ABR 8, 2011
2
votes

You might want to offer your own version of

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Either in English or in Spanish smile

I can't resist..

"because the other Manchester supporters had already crossed."

raspberry wink

updated JUL 11, 2010
posted by Vikingo
I love it. An all English team! - ray76, JUL 11, 2010
1
vote

The chickeen wanted to cross the road to get to the other side

updated JUL 11, 2010
posted by xX0121LloydieXx
1
vote

Why does everyone question the chicken??? Why don't you question the turtle since you see them cross more often than chickens. GOSH PEOPLE!! Just leave him alone(=

updated JUL 11, 2010
posted by reikorivera
1
vote

The chicken crossed the road because he had the freedom to do so. It is in his charter of rights. The freedom of movement. chicken dance Pictures, Images and Photos

updated JUL 11, 2010
edited by Brynleigh
posted by Brynleigh
Anybody love the "chicken dance"? - Brynleigh, JUL 11, 2010
1
vote

Sr. Spock: Porque fue la cosa más lógica hacer.

Because it was the most logical thing to do.

updated JUL 11, 2010
posted by lkelly
1
vote

UNITED STATES MARINE CORPS MARCHING SONG: To get to the left from the right. Stepped on a train, got hit by a plane. He aint no chicken no more. Your left, your left, your left right left...

updated JUL 10, 2010
posted by Nathaniel
povrosito! - Nise, JUL 10, 2010
This really is funny,jajajaj - Brynleigh, JUL 10, 2010
Better not miss a step! - Silvia, JUL 10, 2010
1
vote

I don't think the chicken knew why, so why should anyone know 'WHY'.

updated JUL 10, 2010
posted by John-doyle
1
vote

LOL Excellent - I love Fridays! ¡El viernes me gusto mucho!

updated JUL 10, 2010
posted by tom5
0
votes

To be honest the chicken was clearly outside its normal environment. To make fun of it when it obviously had no idea what was going on is being totally insensitive to its feelings. I thought the members here had more respect for other creatures.

updated ABR 8, 2011
posted by Eddy
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