Translate excercise about Chapo's escape

Question

Here is a carton from Trino, a mexican cartoonist, about Chapo's escape. I think it would be fun to try to translate it. Would you like to try?

Answer 1

next!

Altiplano travel agency, have a seat.

o.k.

So you want to take a cruise?

Yes, I want to go with my family.

We have a very good plan.

There's a trip to Alaska...and please don't tell me the joke about "A las carnitas"

I was about to tell it.

Don't

The trip is 15 days and costs 5 million pesos

That's cheap!

The expensive thing is the toll...that costs 40 million pesos.

Well, Chutamero what are you going to do? Are you going to go on vacation? Nel, going through the exit tunnel is very expensive; there are different levels of tips.

Altiplano and carnitas were words I couldn't translate without looking it up.

Altiplano= high plateau carnitas= barbequed pork

If I interpreted this correctly, what is the joke "A las carnitas"? I may be missing the point. - Sassette, Jul 15, 2015

Great! Excelente traducción, Sassette! - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015

Carnitas is barbequed pork, it is a joke with Alaska... Voy a Alaska... A las carnitas. - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015

El Altiplano is the name of the prison from which the Chapo escaped: The Federal Social Readaptation Center No. 1 "Altiplano" - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015

It is called "El Altiplano" because the prison is located in the high plateau of Mexico. - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015

cinco mil pesos....five thousand pesos. - gringojrf, Jul 15, 2015

Right, cinco mil pesos... Tips are not included. - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015

"Nel" is a slang for "no": nope. - LuisCache, Jul 15, 2015