Is this grammatically correct???

Question

Cuando miro hasta al cielo Todo quiero es volar En la distancia

Quiero ír a un lugar Donde el cielo es más claro Y donde no hay miedo

Cuando miro las estrellas Nadie puede entender Lo que descubró

Thanks, just want to know if it makes sense, it's a song I'm writing, welcome to any changes you'd like to suggest. Gracias

Is this what you are trying to say in your song? When I look up to the sky all i want is to fly into the distance I want to go to a place where the sky is clearer and where there is no fear when I look at the stars Nobody can understand what I discover - SariaStephens, May 21, 2015

Welcome to SpanishDict. Please add you level of Spanish/English to your profile. - rac1, May 21, 2015

Yes that's exactly what I'm trying to say - iluvutinix, Jun 4, 2015

Answer 1

Bosque has the right idea. Here are a few corrections.

"hacia el cielo" OK

"todo lo que quiero OK

"descubrí or he descubierto The past participle of descubrir is irregular.

I might also say " donde el cielo está más claro." We use "estar" for conditions.

Thanks, every once in a while I forget some of the irregular past participles. :) - bosquederoble, May 22, 2015

:) - FELIZ77, May 22, 2015

Bosque, I forgot an important but irregular past participle last year when I was in Calella, Spain and said, "he volvido" instead of he vuelto. I felt stupid when I realized my mistake while I was walking back to the hotel from the shop - FELIZ77, May 22, 2015

Did you know that Spanish has only 10 irregular past participles and Engilsh has over 200. Did I have fun learning English? Whew! - Daniela2041, May 22, 2015

Phew lol that must have been fun lol and very hard work, too, Daniela ;) - FELIZ77, May 22, 2015

Answer 2

Hello Iluvitinix,

Welcome to the SpanishDict forum.

I really like your song. Have you composed any music to accompany your lyrics?

I would just like to clarify why the Spanish use the word 'hacia' here instead of hasta; although hasta was a reasonable and intelligent guess!

Hacia means towards: I look/gaze towards the sky (or the heavens.) = Miro hacia el cielo.

Hasta means until

ex: Wait until I get back home....before feeding the dog!

= ¡Espera hasta a que llegue a casa...antes de dar de comer al perro!

I hope this helps

Corrijan mi español si es necesario, por favor

Thanks, yeh I have chords on guitar, still working on full song though - iluvutinix, Jun 4, 2015

You're welcome :) Sounds very good /i nteresting :) - FELIZ77, Jun 4, 2015

Answer 3

Cuando miro hasta al cielo Todo quiero es volar En la distancia Quiero ír a un lugar Donde el cielo es más claro Y donde no hay miedo Cuando miro las estrellas Nadie puede entender Lo que descubró

Since no one is answering you, although not really qualified, I will give my thoughts.

I would say "hacia el cielo" instead of "hasta al cielo", and instead of "todo quiero" it might need to be "todo lo que quiero", but I am not sure on that.

Descubró does not match miro, Descubrí does, but I would have said lo que he descubridido.

I am an intermediate level learner so no guarantees, just my thoughts.

Hi, Bosque!! - Daniela2041, May 22, 2015