spanish --> english translation please

Question

i know it is horrible horrible spanish but please try? (good luck!) :

ay como ay gente batalloza pinches biejas chizmozas mitoteras y eso q son de la familia q sino omg pero purdanse q yo sigo avanzando y sus comentarios me valen madres y como dijo yeni rivera busquenle asta q me encuentren para q bean los ovarios q yo cargo

thank you in advance ^.^

Meagan, could you capitalize and punctuate your English for the sake of the learners trying to learn proper English? Thanks. - katydew, Jan 6, 2013

Was this a text message, Meagan? I think this might be over my head for helping you out. - katydew, Jan 6, 2013

Meagan, I've tried but we need a native! - annierats, Jan 6, 2013

Answer 1

Here's my two cents:

Rewrite:

Ay, cómo hay gente belicosa. Pinches viejas chismosas mitoteras y eso que son de la familia. Que si no, Dios me valga. Pero púdranse que yo seguiré avanzando y sus comentarios me valen madre. Y como dijo Jeni Rivera búsquenme hasta que me encuentren para que vean los ovarios que cargo.

---

There are lots of trouble makers out there. Stupid, gossipy and loud women. The worse is that they're from my own family. Otherwise, God only knows. But you all can rot in hell, I will continue moving forward and I could not care less about your comments. Like Jeni Rivera said, come out looking for me and you'll find me. Soon you'll realize what I am really made of.

And a vote for you too Franco - ian-hill, Jan 6, 2013

Answer 2

I'll have ago, but it's clearly a text or face-book speech and it's Mexican, I think, and I don't actually understand it.Taking all that into account you're welcome to my best effort. With any luck some Mexican young person will hasten to our assistance1

ay como ay gente batalloza pinches biejas chizmozas mitoteras y eso q son de la familia q sino omg pero purdanse q yo sigo avanzando y sus comentarios me valen madres y como dijo yeni rivera busquenle asta q me encuentren para q bean los ovarios q yo carg

Ay, como hay gente batalloza pinches viejas chizmozas mitoteras y eso que son de la familia, que sino dios mío? pero purganse?? que yo sigo avanzando y sus comentarios me valen madres, y como dijo Jenni Rivera, busquenle hasta que me encuentren para que vean los ovarios que yo cargo.

As there are troublemaking old gossipers who prod/ prick ?? , and that's just in the family, without which cleaning out/purging where would we be? I carry on forwards and their commentaries are rubbish/ don't matter to me, and as Jenny Riviera says, They(?) keep looking for me? until they might see the very ovaries I carry.

Help please, this is my worst effort ever, I can't think why I started on it. - annierats, Jan 6, 2013

I think you did wonderfully.. I wonder if part of the phrase are lyrics. - PeterRS, Jan 6, 2013

You deserve a vote Annie x - ian-hill, Jan 6, 2013

I actually tried this after correcting the obvious 'b - v" spelling mistakes, and que for 'q' and the missing 'h' on hasta and hay, but I got to the ovaries part and realized, oops, over my head on this one. jejejeje - katydew, Jan 6, 2013