Spanish jokes (chistes en español)

Question

Have you ever heard a Spanish joke?. Are you able to tell us?

If so, ÁNIMO.

AHÍ MI CHISTE:

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Entra una señora a la carnicería y dice

Señora: Déme esa cabeza de cerdo de allí.

Carnicero: Perdone señora, pero eso es un espejo.

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In English:

A woman go in butcher's shop and she says

Woman: I'd like this pig's head you've got over there

Butcher: I'm sorry Madam, but this is a mirror.

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Bad joke, yesssss, I know

Might be a bad joke, but I'm encouraged that I understood a simple joke and laughed. Thanks. - katydew, May 25, 2012

Katy I've just tell my joke in my poor English. Try to understand again. Spain is a country with a good sense of humour. In this case, the woman was looking herself in a mirror and she was the pig. - josemaloru, May 25, 2012

I am moving your post to the practice section. - rac1, May 25, 2012

Answer 1

Well, a Brithish English joke:

Two balloons are floating over the desert, and a balloon says to the other: take care with the cactussssssssss

(it deflates)

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2 globos vuelan por el desierto y un globo le dice al otro: ten cuidado con los cactussssssss

(se desinfla)

Answer 2

more of British humour...

I've got a lovely house with all mod. cons. , and electrical oven, running water (cold in the winter and hot in the summer.... hahahaha), etc... but the walls are very thin. Thin like a sheet paper... Yesterday I asked my wife a question and the woman who lives in the next house answered!!!!!...

Do you get it?... no?... oh, never mind!!!!.... very very very baaadddd jokeee

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Tengo una casa preciosa con todas las comodidades, un horno eléctrico, agua corriente (fría en invierno, y caliente en verano...), pero las paredes son muy finas. Finas como una hoja de papel. Ayer le pregunté a mi mujer una pregunta y la señora que vive en la casa de al lado me contestó....

Es un chiste muy malo....

It is. It is a bad joke. :D But that's not the important thing here. :) - inkubzz, May 25, 2012

I agree with you.... It's a British joke.... Spanish jokes are poor... hahaha - josemaloru, May 25, 2012

Answer 3

Let's put these jokes in this thread: La Taberna de Don Jose

Very good idea. La Taberna has been quiet lately. Perhaps we need dancing boys? - 0095ca4c, May 29, 2012

Good idea! - josemaloru, May 30, 2012

Answer 4

Yes, I guess it is bad, but it still made me laugh for some reason. :D

• Hay tres clases de personas:
• las que saben contar y las que no.

Answer 5

En un restaurante de un puerto, llega un hombre y pide:

• Camarero, quisiera un plato de ostras, que sean frescas, que estén bien limpias, que no estén muy frías, las quiero condimentadas, pero no mucho, que….

El camarero interrumpe y pregunta:

• Perdone señor…., ¿las quiere usted con perla o sin perla?

Answer 6

oh Man I had to use Spanish Translation to understand this one

Me too....... - ZAYESHA, May 25, 2012