i need some help please
i want someone to see my (narrative) essay i write about my self thanke you.
Many things happened to me in my whole life good things and bad things. In this essay I would like to tell you a story about me.
I burned in 1993 and came to this life. My mother was very happy to me; she loved me and cared of me. I was very lovely and beautiful. When I grew up and became 10 years old I was playing football game every week. I loved football game and I was enthusiastic about the teams and players in football game. I loved many things such as swimming and video games but football game was the best game for me.
However, when I was 16 years old and became mature and adult I understood the real life. There was bad things happened to me and in the same time there was good things also happened. In the school I was a good student and the entire students in my class loved me. I got up early every morning and took a bus downtown to arrive me to school. I was in the team school and i like it.
I learnt many things in my life and I also learnt from my mistakes. Now I can handle the problems better than before. I got a lot advises from many important people for me such as my friends and my family.
2 Answers
I want someone to see my (narrative) essay I wrote about myself thank you.
Many things happened to me in my life both good things and bad things. In this essay I would like to tell you a story about me.
I was born in 1993 and came into this life. My mother was very happy; she loved me and cared for me. I was very lovely and beautiful. When I grew up and became 10 years old I played football every week. I enjoyed football and I was enthusiastic about the teams and players. I enjoyed many things such as swimming and video games but football was my favorite activity.
However, when I was 16 years old and became a mature adult I began to understand the real world. There were bad things that happened to me and at the same time there were good things that also happened. In school I was a good student and all of the students in my class loved me. I got up early every morning and took a bus downtown to get to school. I was on the football team at school and i liked it.
I learned many things in my life and I also learned from my mistakes. Now I can handle the problems better than before. I got a lot of advise from many important people such as my friends and my family.
Very good try with your English, guy. I give you much credit for your very strong submission! Excellent revision, J, very well done. Just one small spelling change:
Very last sentence of the story: I got a lot of advise should read "I got a lot of advice . . . .
