Should you use "tu" or "usted" when addressing your parents?

Question

I know that "usted" is formal, and used with people you have just met, people who are much older, your superiors, people you're aren't close with, or people you just respect. (etc) But what about your parents? No matter how close you and your parents are, they ARE still older, and they ARE your superiors, and they DO deserve your respect, right? So, should we use "usted"? What do the native Spanish-speakers use when addressing their parents? Thanks.

Excellent question indeed ... - Mndeen75, Feb 7, 2012

Answer 1

This is an excellent question.

I have a friend from Honduras who told me that she has always addressed her parents as "usted", out of respect.

On the other hand, my Mexican students always address their parents as "tú".

In summary, I believe it depends on region and family.

Until the first quarter of XX Century, it was usually employed "usted o ustedes". With the modernity, markedly on urban societies, "tú" and "vosotros" became familiar. - elekt786, Feb 7, 2012

Answer 2

In Spanish, you should refer to your parents, teachers, pastor/priest, boss, etc. as "usted" The fact that in some countries people have become used to using "tú" doesn't make it ok. You will be safe if you learn the right way, otherwise, you could be find yourself in an embarrassed situation when some one might tell you. "Por favor, no me llame de "tú", nosotros no somos así de conocidos" If your family is okay with it, then, that is their family culture, but be careful!

I disagree, Farallon. Where I grew up, and now living in Puerto Rico, most people address their parents as "tú". My relationship with my boss is very informal, so he is "tú" as well. While I agree that when in doubt, it's best to err on the side .... - Gekkosan, Feb 7, 2012

...of caution, and use "usted", I would not go as far as to say "It's not ok". I go along with Mountaingirl's asnwer, and say that it depends on where you are, and how you were raised. - Gekkosan, Feb 7, 2012

You are talking about "special situations" and not as a norm. The person who asked the question was probably not talking about going especifically to Puerto Rico, but to any Spanish speaking country. Better be safe than sorry. Usted is safer everywhere! - farallon7, Feb 8, 2012

I'm not talking about any country or personal situation in particular. I am talking as a language in general. There are words that are ok in Spain that I would never dare to use anywhere else! Be safe, save yourself from uncomfortable situations. Up to U! - farallon7, Feb 8, 2012

"become used to using* tú.." --- and for your comment, "specifically"* - Goldie_Miel, Feb 8, 2012

Goldie-Miel, Thanks for your corrections! - farallon7, Feb 8, 2012