Watching Tv is bad for children 4

Question

This is the conclusion of my essay, please could you check it?

In conclusion, thought it is often assumed that watching Television is bad for children, this opinion cannot be any more false, over all I think that everything that God give us is good for us, but depends on the use we give them, we give to things exactly that must be without go to extremes; hence, the ate is good for human, but if we eat a lot of sick, and in the specific case of the TV, it is imperative that the parents are aware of the time and content of the programs and games the children are exposed to; thus the educational television programs do have a strong impact on children and their learning abilities.

Thanks.

Answer 1

1) thought = pensamiento, though = aunque

2) Television no necesita tener una mayuscula salvo que es la primera palabra en la oración.

3) Kittykat123 tiene razón. Necesita ser más que una sola oración. He hecho algunas sugerencias sobre donde que debería ser rota.

4) No creo que Díos nos ha dado el TV porque fue inventado por humanos.

5) En mi opinión, en un papel formal, uno solo debería usar "television." La abreviatura "TV" me suena muy informal. Pero eso solo es mi opinión.

El párrafo con mis sugerencias y correcciones...

In conclusion, though it is often assumed that watching television is bad for children, this opinion cannot be more false. Over all, I think that television -- like so many things in life -- can be either good or bad depending on how we use it. Most things should be done in moderation and not to the extreme. For example, eating is good for us, but, if we eat too much, we get sick. And, in the case of television, it is imperative that parents be aware of the time and content of the programs and games their children are exposed to. Thus, educational television programs do have a strong impact on children and their learning abilities.

.

Aviso: hay unas palabras que he borrado, pero eso no es muy obvio porque...pues...porque están borradas. Entonces, ¡préstate atención a las palabras que no hay! Además, esta frase: "we give to things exactly that must be"...esta no me tiene sentido en absoluto, y por eso no estoy seguro que la he interpretado correctamente.

Espero que esto te ayude un poco.

Saludos.

Muchas gracias webdunce sobre todo por la forma tan especial que tienes para enseñar, contigo aprendo mucha, gracias nuevamene - maylegoas, Dec 12, 2011

De nada. Y muchas gracias por el buen cumplido. ^ _ ^ - webdunce, Dec 12, 2011

Nice. - MaryMcc, Dec 12, 2011

Answer 2

It is very good but i think that it's one VERY long run-on sentence. i would seperate it a littne