My bedroom is my favorite room...

Question

Please, Could you help me, with this?

My bedroom is my favorite room due to four reasons. Perhaps, the main reason is that my bedroom is cozy. I live in a Unidad Vecinal No 3, which was built by the ex president of our country Mr. Architect Belaunde, the houses built by him all are too comfortable, and my bedroom although small is too cozy. perhaps, all the furniture are very pretty and they are putting in special form. I always say that my bedroom is like a fairy room. Another reason is that my bedroom is pretty comfortable although it is small, I have there all that I can need in special my pillow that it is an intelligent pillow because it pressure relieving material is very heat sensitive, it can memorize my body temperature and weight and shape itself to the exact contours of my neck. It is very important to me, because before I got out of my bed with neck pain. In my cozy bedroom I have privacy overall when I pray at three o'clock pm I turn on my candle and I can pray and meditate with total tranquility. To summarize, although my bedroom is small it is cozy, comfortable, private and beauty like a fairy room, my bedroom is my preferred room in my house.

Thanks.

You did a great job on this! I made only a few changes. - --Mariana--, Oct 7, 2011

Thanks for encouraging - maylegoas, Oct 7, 2011

Answer 1

My bedroom is my favorite room for four reasons. The main reason is that my bedroom is cozy. I live in Unidad Vecinal No 3, which was built by the ex president of our country, the architect Mr. Belaunde. The houses built by him are very comfortable, and my bedroom, although small, is cozy. This may be because the furniture is attractive and well placed. I always say that my bedroom is like a fairy room. The second reason is that my bedroom is pretty comfortable. Although it is small, I have all the special things I need, particularly my pillow that is an "intelligent pillow" because it is made of a pressure relieving material that is very heat sensitive. It can memorize my body temperature and weight and shape itself to the exact contours of my neck. It is very important to me, because before I used to get out of my bed with neck pain. In my cozy bedroom I have privacy. When I pray at three PM I light my candle and I can pray and meditate with total tranquility. To summarize, although my bedroom is small it is cozy, comfortable, private and beautiful, like a fairy room, my bedroom is my favorite room in my house.

Hola May, y bien hecho. No he visto algunos mensajes de ti recientemente. Espero que el de arriba te ayude, y que todavía estás bien. Mostré las pruebas nuevas en letras negras, pero las que borré ya no están parte del texto.

Hola Jeremias, me da mucho gusto de saber de ti y como siempre ayudandome, pues no apareci por un tiempo porque deje de estudiar un mes, pero nuevamente he retomado mis clases y gracias nuevamente por enseñarme. - maylegoas, Oct 7, 2011

because before, Without the comma it appears that there is something to add to the sentence. - Eddy, Oct 7, 2011

Answer 2

My bedroom is my favorite room due to four reasons. (introductory statement)

1. cozy
2. the pillow
3. ??
4. ??

To summarize:...(summary statement)

Take your audience by the hand and guide them through your narrative.

Thanks qfreed you are Ok I'm going to take care about that - maylegoas, Oct 7, 2011

Answer 3

My bedroom is my favorite room for four reasons. Perhaps, the main reason is that my bedroom is cozy. I live in a Unidad Vecinal No 3, which was built by the ex-president of our country**, the architect, ** Mr. Belaunde. The houses built by him are very comfortable. My bedroom, although small, is too cozy, perhaps. The furniture is very pretty and made in a special form. I always say that my bedroom is like a fairy tale room. Another reason is that my bedroom is pretty comfortable, although it is small, because I have --- all that I -- need. I have a special -- pillow that i-- is an intelligent pillow because it is made of pressure-relieving material that is also very heat sensitive. It can memorize my body temperature and weight and shape itself to the exact contours of my neck. It is very important to me, because before I used to get out of my bed with neck pain. In my cozy bedroom I have privacy overall when I pray at three o'clock in the afternoon. I turn on my candle and I can pray and meditate with total tranquility. To summarize, although my bedroom is small, it is cozy, comfortable, private and beautiful like a fairy tale room. My bedroom is my favorite room in my house.

Thanks Mariana - maylegoas, Oct 7, 2011

Answer 4

Well done overall, Maylegolas. Here are a couple of comments: "too" means "demasiado," so you would say instead "very comfortable" and "very cozy." In your last line you have a series of adjectives with one noun (beauty), so change the noun to an adjective. Spanish allows you to join two independent clauses (sentences) with a comma, but a silly rule does not allow this in English writing. Check to see where you have joined two independent clauses with a comma. The easiest fix is to change the comma to a period and start a new sentence. Example: You have used the "illegal" comma in the part beginning with "I live in...." Change the comma after "Belaunde" to a period. By the way, your bedroom sounds nice!

thanks Luzbonita - maylegoas, Oct 7, 2011