The importance of "please" and "thank you"
I posted this text on the International Café thread this morning. Heidita recommended I post it here and open the topic for discussion.
I occasionally see a member prepare a detailed response that has clearly required significant effort. Unfortunately, these efforts are not always recognized by a simple “thank you” from the member asking the question.
After working across language cultures for several years, I have come to believe that courtesy is appreciated in every culture. I work with people from areas in Latin America, China, Hong Kong, Korea, India, eastern Europe and the Arab world. I can see that everyone appreciates “please” and “thank you”. I believe the concept of courtesy passes through all cultures.
I believe courtesy is especially important in a forum like this. A quick “gracias” or “thank you” goes a long way toward promoting a friendly environment. To me, this courtesy says more about the character of the member than anything.
In this cross-culture, quick response environment, members can be easily and unintentionally offended or misunderstood by members unaware of cultural differences. I believe routine courteous responses can minimize the impact of these situations.
"Please” and “thank you” can cover a multitude of errors and go far to promote healthy discussion and courteous responses.
10 Answers
I think the Word of the Day, la manera, touches on this a little. Wikipedia.com says in part, "...manners are the unenforced standards of conduct which demonstrate that a person is proper, polite, and refined....".
I suppose different cultures have what is proper or polite or refined. But the simple action of "please" and "thank you" are universal. Many universal codes of conduct and behavior have been lost. Only those who choose to behave honorably will do so.
I posted this photo on the word of the day but I think it's good to post here as well.
Gracias, for the post and comments!
Thank you, Dogwood. And perhaps this is the place to mention that the questioner who has usually worked long and hard on a post deserves a vote every time for having a great question that someone can put a post in. I am amazed sometimes that a Word or Picture of the day will have 20 or so answers and the person posting will only have 8 votes. We should be voting that person up every time when we answer the question. It is a way of thanking them for doing the post. Also, when someone does a post, such as a birthday or a congratulations post, they should vote every person up in that post. This is a great site and I think that we want to be courteous to each other. Thank you everyone!
I'd would say I agree with this post in a 80%.
The remaining 20% is due to the fact that I don't feel the courtesy as something that can easily be judged or measured for adding or not a couple of words.
I take on board what you say, Dogwood, but we all are different, and it's obvious that we write here in different circumstances and for different reasons.
I've already come upon a few good surprises here in the forum and I've promised myself not to judge too soon again.
Dogwood, this is so true and you are right in drawing it to people's attention here! 
Thank you sooo much for doing this 
Everyone likes to feel appreciated here and it can be almost heratbreaking for most people to spend alot of time researching information to give someone an accurate /true answer just to be met with no response at all. 
Even when you can give give a clear, accurate and helpful answer straightaway it is still appropriate for the questioner to show the courtesy and respect of thanking the participants especially when congratulations have been given!
I am amazed when someone asks a question to which I, amongst other, have offered a response and the questioner does not even have the courtesy to show an interest in the answers to give a vote to any or just provide a brief comment to say whether or not we gave them the answer they were looking for.
As far as I am concerned courtesy and respect will always be important
Thanks for posting this. I often wonder what has happened to common courtesy in our society.
I find myself using "please" and "thank you," somewhat in excess sometimes, whenever I travel because politeness is universal.
...courtesy says more about the character of the member than anything.
This is so true.
I am often more surprised, and bothered, by the lack of "pleases" than the lack of thank yous. Not that one is less important than the other, but we do get some rather rude "demands", not even requests....
I find it kind of rude when I read through the questions and I see "translate this" or "proofread this....". I usually don't even like to open those up. Who are you? Everybodys boss? Sorry, had to vent a little. Anyway, dogwood is absolutely correct, in that please and thank you goes a long way. Lets hope those old dogs can learn a new trick . Gracias. Amor y paz
So true! And it also should be remembered that in conversation, one should greet the person(s) to whom one is speaking before demanding something from them! This particular discourtesy comes from the U.S. where we expect people to immediately take cognizance of our expectations without so much as a simple "Buenos días, Señora" (and then wonder why we are regarded as rude, demanding bullies). ¡muchas gracias por un buen consejo! 
Gek, Amor, and Persistent have identified the problem that actually prompted this thread. Without identifying the thread specifically, a "demand" question was posted to the forum. A well-respected member of the forum responded to the question with a great response that required considerable effort, but the member asking the question did not recognize the effort or the answer by saying "thank you" or voting.
I just shook my head. It was very rude, so I decided to bring it up on the café page to see if anyone else noticed it.
