HomeQ&AGrammar on Poem Translation

Grammar on Poem Translation

1
vote

Hello to all the wonderful people out there. I wrote a poem in English and then translated into Spanish. Would someone be so kind to comment and make correction? I numbered each line so to make it easier to follow the corresponding line of translation between English and Spanish. Thank you so much in advance.

I Want To Tell You

  1. To you

  2. There is much I want to speak

  3. But I do not have the words

  4. To you

  5. There is so much I want to tell

  6. But I do not know the words

  7. Your beauty so hypnotic

  8. Your voice so beautiful

  9. Your soul so magnificent

  10. It makes me want to tell you more

  11. But the words which I do not know how to express

  12. Spanish, a language of beauty

  13. It is that I need to learn

  14. So I can tell you all what is in my mind and heart

  15. To tell you how beautiful and wonderful you are

  16. Will you give me time to learn the words?

Quiero Decirte

  1. A ti

  2. Hay tanto que quiero hablar

  3. Pero no tengo las palabras

  4. A ti

  5. Hay tanto que quiero decirte

  6. Pero yo no sé las palabras

  7. Tu belleza tan hipnótica

  8. Tu voz tan hermosa

  9. Tu alma tan magnífica

  10. Me hace quiero decirte más

  11. Pero las palabras que yo no sé cómo expresar

  12. Español, un idioma de la belleza

  13. Lo que tengo que aprender

  14. Así que puedo decirte todo lo que está en mi mente y corazón

  15. Para decirte lo hermoso y maravilloso que eres

  16. ¿Me das tiempo para aprender las palabras?***

1473 views
updated JUL 1, 2010
edited by --Mariana--
posted by Steve-Choi
Try to avoid using personal pronouns as in number 6 say instead, 'no sé las palabras' - FELIZ77, JUN 30, 2010
also applies to number 11 - FELIZ77, JUN 30, 2010
number 11 I think this part should be: 'cómo a expresar' - FELIZ77, JUN 30, 2010
Otherwise the translations appear to be sound/accurate - FELIZ77, JUN 30, 2010

1 Answer

1
vote

I think you can't say Me hace quiero

10.Me hace querer decirte

for 16, me das is pressent tense, if you wanna say will you give me, you'll say ¿me darás?

updated JUL 1, 2010
posted by timothychongg
SpanishDict is the world's most popular Spanish-English dictionary, translation, and learning website.
© Curiosity Media Inc.
SOCIAL NETWORKS
APPS