You know you're mexican if...
I found this on the internet, so don't think that I am half mexican or anything that it says.
ok, I was online reading jokes and since I'm part Mexican I found this pretty funny. I'm proud to be Mexican-American and if anyone out there is proud to be Mexican too you'll most likely get a kick out of this. The sad thing is I'm actually shaking my head yes to alot of these lol! My grandparents are from San Luis Potosi and Guanajunto in Mexico.
You Know You're Mexican When...
You have ever been hit by a chancla. ( a slipper)
You pronounce words beginning with the letter "S" by putting an "E" in front of it, (estop instead of stop).
Saying ya echate un chower instead of shower, and combining english with spanish to make "espanglish" an official language....lol
You refer to friends as chato(a), chochera, cuñao, compadre, causa, wevon, cholo(a)
You take soccer too seriously
You're late for EVERYTHING; people have to say the party starts at 4pm so you can arrive by 9pm
You call a chair, a sher.
You have ever hurt yourself and your mamacita rubbed the area while chanting, "Sana, Sana, Colita de rana....."
You have your last name in old English lettering anywhere on your car, truck, or tattooed on your back!
You refer to your wife as your ruca, your hina, your wifa, your old lady, or your vieja, guess what? Not only are you a Mexican, you're a cholo.
You throw a "Grito" every time you hear Vicente Fernandez, then not only are you a Mexican, but you are a drunk Mexican.
You have ever been pinched in church and been told "pobrecito de ti si lloras" or "Vas a ver orita que salgamos."
You have some Tias that dress up in their prom dresses to go to a birthday party at "el parque".
Your Tias and Abuela dress up in their Sunday best with heels and all to go to the "pulga." (AKA the Flea Market)
If most of the houses on your block are painted bright pink, mint green, and lavender.
You use the bushes in front of your house, the fence, or the top of an old car to dry laundry.
You're congested and your mamasita rubbed "Bicks".
You grew up being called "chamaca or chamaco"
Si te persinas with a lotto ticket in your hand before every drawing.
You grew up scared by something called "El Cucuy." (AKA the boogie man)
Others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just talking.
You light a candle on the night of the Lotto drawing.
You use your lips to point something out.
You constantly refer to cereal as "con fleis". (messed up way to say corn flakes)
Your mother yells at the top of her lungs to call you to dinner even if it's a one bedroom apartment.
You can dance ranchera, cumbia or salsa without music.
You use "manteca" (lard) instead of olive oil and can't figure out why your booty is getting bigger.
You call your sneakers "tenees".
You have at least thirty cousins.
You can't imagine anyone not liking spicy food.
You are in a 5-passenger car with 7 people in it and a person shouting "subanse, todavia caben". (basically were saying there's still room)
Whenever you feel under the weather, you compulsively dab on some "Vics" vapor rub all over your chest and inside your nostrils.
Your mom packs your "lonchera" everyday. (lonchera is your lunch)
You or someone you know uses "Tres Flores" in their hair. (Tres Flores is a hair product that translates to three flowers.)
Tamales, champurrado, posole and menudo (all Mexican foods) are must haves on Thanksgiving.
There is more Corona than punch at little Juanito's birthday party.
There is at least one member in your family name Maria, Guadalupe, Juan, Jose, or Jesus.
Everyone still thinks Cesar Chavez is the best boxer even if he lost against Oscar De La Hoya.
You've gone to the Pulgamarket every weekend for years.
You step into a house that has all those little figurines taking up every inch of space on/under the TV.
You have a porcelain cat, dog, Buddha, or elephant in your living room.
You have plastic slipcovers on your sofas.
You swear "Choco Mil" is the same as Slim Fast and try to lose weight by drinking it. (Choco Mil is more or less Chocolate milk)
You have a drunk uncle/aunt.
You're still afraid to open that umbrella in your house.
You not only know who Don Francisco from Sabado Gigante (Giant Saturday) is, but you tell people he's your tio. (tio=uncle)
Your mother, tia (aunt) or hermana's (sister) hair is blackcherry, "Sun in" red or a burgundy that would make Celia Cruz jealous.
You have a cousin named "Guero" who's darker than night
You always try to find out what town another fellow Latino's family is from.
You have ever had to "beepiar" a friend on their pager.
You wear your Sunday best to do laundry at the laundrymat and go grocery shopping.
You have told your kid not to walk the floor barefoot or they'll catch a cold.
You go to a wedding or Quinceañera, gossip about how bad the comida (food) is, but be the first to take a plato (plate) to go.
You have a bottle of Tapatio (type of hot sauce) in your purse.
Your cousins are delinquents / hootchies.
You have a chola (gangster) in your barrio (neighborhood) named "La Flaca" (skinny) who's bigger than a house.
You think Cristina trumps Oprah any day.
Just about everyone you meet can't understand that Mexican is an ethnic group not a race and that Mexicans come in all shades and physical features.
You know a chola (gangster) named "La Shy Girl" who is loud and obnoxious.
You need to point out how much something you just bought cost.
You go to a gringa (non-Hispanic) friend's house for dinner and don't understand the concept of sitting at a table.
You've tried to bring a mango back to the US from Mexico, and a bonus point if you actually made it all the way home with it.
You have a bottle of Bacardi or Tequila in your house right now.
You drive a "Cheby", an "Ohsmobeel" or a "Bolswahgon"
You're proud to be Mexican - and you pass these jokes on to all your Mexican friends!
13 Answers
Just a little correction, America does not recognize dual citizenship so it's not possible to be Mexican-American, no more than African-American. You are an American or you are not!
You use your lips to point something out.
I love this one!! It's so true and funny.
LOL - This is hilarious. My friends used to say that I was almost Mexican and I guess it's true because I have seen, done or at least understood the vast majority of these.
I've seen people be hit by a chanclas and have certainly tripped on a few. I've heard estop, chato, compadre, y wevon regularly. I've seen Mexicans watch soccer, dios mio and it took me some time to learn to invite people over at 2:00 for an evening meal. I've heard "Sana, Sana, Colita de rana" but had forgotten it and have seen several old English lettered tattoos. I've been called ruca, wifa y vieja. I knew someone nicknamed "Cucuy" but never new that it means the boogie man until now (but I'm not in the least bit surprised). I'm sure that I've seen someone point to the con fleis with their lips. Everyone I knew had at least 30 cousins and I think I could still dance at least the cumbia without music. I can't imagine anyone not liking spicy food. I remember very tight car rides and food with manteca. I love tamales, have cooked posole but never liked menudo. I can't remember what champurrado is but I remember the word. I've had mole on Thanksgiving. I've drank Corona at Juanito's birthday party with Juan, Jesus and two vatos named Jose. I've been called Ana Maria when someone would forget my name. I've been to pulgas. I've washed tenees. Don Francisco is my tio. I always knew what town everyone was from. At least several of our cousins were delinquents and I really did know a chola en el barrio named la flaca but she really was skinny. I've met white Mexicans and black Mexicans. It took me a while to learn not to sit at a table and to eat with tortillas instead of forks. I may have lost my honorary Mexican status by now but this sure did make me laugh. Thanks, Hecho.
Hello HECHO_EN_MEXICO:
That is very funny!!!!!!
I live in South Florida, and we have a small population of Mexican's here, but enough that I have talked to several in my business, and I sometimes go to a Spanish supermarket, listening to Spanish. I can hear the difference between Cuban/Columbian and Mexican's speaking. A business person I know is from Cuba, and I talked to him last week about the differences. It was funny, he said to me, "Don't feel bad if you can't understand Mexicans, I can't either". It was just a lighthearted joking comment, but it is interesting that you should post this at this time.
You throw a "Grito" every time you hear Vicente Fernandez, then not only are you a Mexican, but you are a drunk Mexican.
I enjoyed watching Vincente El Rey on youtube with my Ecuadorian friend, he tells me I would love Mexico.
It's all making me smile to read it Hecho, thank you for sharing. 
Sooo funny, glad this popped up - only O N E that I didn't get... 'Si te persinas with a lotto ticket in your hand before every drawing' - Someone tell me please - what the heck is persinas?
Holy crud! Too freakin' funny. Thanks for sharing! And yes, I can relate to the following as well:
You have ever been hit by a chancla. ( a slipper), others tell you to stop screaming when you are really just talking, you use your lips to point something out (your not supposed to do this?), you have at least thirty cousins, you can't imagine anyone not liking spicy food, you have a drunk uncle/aunt, you have told your kid not to walk the floor barefoot or they'll catch a cold, your cousins are delinquents / hootchies and you have a bottle of Bacardi or Tequila in your house right now.
Half of my childhood flashed before my eyes: we didn't make Mexican dishes for Thanksgiving but we did make them on Christmas Eve, every year at my grandmother's house. 
Good memories there. Thanks again hecho en mex!!
I found this so entertaining , exquisitely funny and it has me laughing like a drain . What makes it most acceptable to me is that it is written by a Mexican therefore I can laugh with him and not at him. But there is a disturbing factor in that I can admit to at least 10 of these points being relevant to me ,and I have been told that my dear mother was something of a sport in her youth and traveled the Americas, do you think I should ask her pertinent questions concerning my antecedents. I adore garlic, chili,Pimentos, Salsa, flamenco, large hats, tight fitting trousers, and carry a bottle of "Cholula" in my backpack, and have been known to cry out 'Olay, and caramba at footy matches ,much to the disgust of fans. I have 85 cousins ,many Antonias, Marias and Juans, and at least one Jesus although he was a little disturbed and passed away during a water accident . therefore I would like to apply for at least "distant relative status" thank you for an enjoyable interesting and informative post.
Hasta luego y adios de su tîo raimundo.
You want to see funny, watch: mind-of-mencia
My neighbor calls my handyman "guera" and he is quite dark. LOL
Voy a compartir este con un amigo mío mexicano.
I'm going to share this with a Mexican friend of mine.
this is funny but it's true. a lot of these are like me and my friends.
Sabe si es Mexicano cuando dice a su hijo para que lea, "Hijolee!"
You know you are Mexican when you yell at your children so they will read!, "Hijolee!"
