Being bilingual...Ser bilingue
Esmeralda Santiago, author of "When I Was Puerto Rican" and "Almost a Woman" observed that being bilingual has its challenges:
"...the truth is that often, when conversing with friends or family members, I find myself in limbo between Spanish and English, wanting to say something but just not able to get it out, caught in some sort of frustrating language-related fog. In order to get out of it, I have to decide in which language I am going to formulate my words and have confidence that, be they in Spanish or in English, my words will make sense and that the person with whom I am speaking will understand me."
"...la verdad es que, muchas veces, al converar con amigos o familiares, me encuentro en el limbo entre español e inglés, queriendo decir algo que no me sale, envuelta en una tiniebla idiomática frustrante. Para salir de ella, tengo que decidir en cuál idioma voy a formular mis palabras y confiar en que ellas, ya sean en español o en inglés, tendrán sentido y en que la persona con quien estoy hablando me comprenderá."
For those posters who are bilingual, trilingual, or multilingual, is this also your experience?
12 Answers
I have a long way to go toward being as bilingual as some of the people here, but even so, I often find myself in a conversation in English and all the sudden, I have to stop mid-sentence because I realize that the word I had in my head that I was going to use to get my meaning across is a Spanish word, and no English equivalent pops into my head. Sometimes I can't even figure out how to convey all the meanings and baggage of the word, even once I've figured out the English translation. I was in the car the other day and had to think, "Wait, what does derrumbar even mean in English?" It's not that it doesn't have an English translation--of course, it does--or a particularly noteworthy combination of meanings or layers--it doesn't--it was just that derrumbar popped into my head as the natural word for a situation and I wasn't entirely sure what I meant in English for a second. I had never connected it with any English word because I had learned it from hearing it in context many times, not looking it up.
I guess it's because there are a lot of Spanish words that just I don't connect with English ones in my head; they just have their meanings exclusively in the context of Spanish. I suppose that's a good thing, though.
It's funny, because I usually think of English as the language with more words to say very similar things. I'm never surprised when I can't think of how to say exactly what I mean in Spanish--that's to be expected; it's just a sign of my continuing incompetence. But it's always weird to be chattering away in English and have to stop and fumble for a way to explain a Spanish word.
I'm not convinced that I was ever truly bilingual but it was not uncommon that I would spend a week away from home, talking, arguing, organizing people in Spanish for that time and never conscious that it was a foreign language. Then I'd get back home and back to English, although my wife and kids were as hispanohablante as I was (someday perhaps, I'll forget this Gekkoism but I doubt it).
Did I have these moments of hesitation, disorientation, lockup even? I don't now remember them then although I did occasionally wonder which language to use later when we were all back in England.
This is not very helpful, I'm sure, but that's how it was for me.
I have a similar problem. I am fluent in Danish and English, Recently when talking to a Danish friend in Danish I found myself slipping in Spanish words instead of Danish ones. I guess because it was the only other foreign language I knew quite well.
There was a time, years ago, when I could listen to and understand two conversations - one in English and one in Danish - at the same time. Not now though.
Once on returning to England on clearing customs I wanted change some money into £s pounds. I started saying to a startled person. "Me gustaría cambiar 200 dólares ...." I was quite pleased with myself but had to revert to English to get my £s.
Yes, mountaingirl, I have had that sort of experience. I was raised bilingual, English and Spanish, but there are times when I have had a total mental block. This is mostly true when speaking Spanish, rather than English. I think that is because I have spent virtually all of my adult years in an English-speaking environment.
Most of my recent life has been lived in Canada, so the Spanish does not flow quite as easily as it used to. I find that my Spanish vocabulary is somewhat lacking, so the "blocks" do occur. However, it seems that I do best - and I am understood the best - if I stop thinking about it and just let my "gut feel" take over. I think that may be what Esmeralda Santiago is saying as well.
I have read both of these books and found them very interesting from a language perspective. I certainly do not have her expertise, and when in Cuba often found myself speaking to my non-Spanish speaking fellow travelers in Spanish and to my Cuban friends in English many times without the realization of what was happening until I noticed the look of confusion. For me, it's a matter of what comes out, comes out and we just chuckle and go on from there. 
I'll get back to you in a few years. 
Great thread!
Thanks MacFadden, for this excellent observation: "I guess it's because there are a lot of Spanish words that just I don't connect with English ones in my head; they just have their meanings exclusively in the context of Spanish. I suppose that's a good thing, though."
That's how we learn any language - by living it!
I studied in Israel for two years and by the end of the second year I was fluent in Hebrew. Since I went to a school with both Israeli, and foreign students, I was switching back between English and Hebrew all the time.
The truth is though that living a bi-lingual life like that did have its moments. I enjoyed the challenge of it immensely. I would bore everyone with endless comparisons between the languages or about a new word or phase or slang that I had learned.
Once, I spent an entire weekend with Israelis only so for a full 48 hours I spoke only Hebrew. By the end of it my jaw was literally hurting me and I was desperate to speak English! I guess the Hebrew was still work for me.
My friend Dymielle speaks many languages. She is from the Philippines, and they have SOOO many languages. Her first language is Basaya, second Tagalog, third English, and she understands Mindanao. OH and she is learning Spanish with me in school. I know some Tagalog, and it helps me with Spanish because many Tagalog word are simply Spanish written in Tagalog orthography( Spaine ruled the Philippines for about 3 centuries). See if you recognize these:
Kumusta.(From cómo está)
sapatos. (zapatos)
telepono (teléfono)
kabalyo (caballo)
She often forgets that I am not fluent in any Filipino language and often talks to me in several diffrent languages.
Just this weekend I met a bilingual college student from Columbia who has been learning English since he was a child and has been immersed in it for at least half of his life. He was telling me that he feels like he doesn't really speak either language well (though as I talked to him he was clearly proficient in both) and finds that he still struggles to find some words.
Boringly, it's all a question of your definition of "bilingual". Does it mean that you must have grown up using two (or more) languages or does it mean thet you are equally capable in two or more. Does it mean that you speak your languages equally fluently, that you react appropriately to incoming speech or messages in either, that you think in either according to circumstance (with or without interference between the two), that you dream in either indiscriminately - - - - - or what?
I can't answer this question for anyone but me, because our definitions are all different. I don't consider myself bilingual as I said in my first answer but I have a hard time explaining why not. In my time in Latin America and on other occasions, I've passed all the tests I quote except for the "grew up" test but I'm still not bilingual.
What's your take on this?
PS I'm certainly not yet bilingual in English English and US English.
That's tough but being bilingual is something to be proud of
