HomeQ&APor la mañana ella va al molino donde el maíz esta convertido en masa

Por la mañana ella va al molino donde el maíz esta convertido en masa

0
votes

scene 8 ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

Por la mañana ella va al molino donde el maíz esta convertido en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

In morning she goes out to the local mill where the corn is made
into tortilla dough; boys were along the way and outside the mill.

La tortilladora está haciendo ruidos fuertes según gira;
las mujeres del pueblo con sus cubetas esperan su turno.

A tortilla machine is making a loud creaking sound as it revolves;
village girls with buckets are waiting in the line for their turns.

Un joven sano con una gorra de béisbol la mueve y la sonríe;
ella pretende no haberle visto para nada o haber fijado en él.

A healthy youth in a baseball cap turns his cap and smiles;
she made to look as if she had not ever noticed his gesture.

Ella camina más allá de su mirada, llevándose con ella ese interés;
sigue percibiendo esa mirada dentro de ella, manteniéndose quieta.

She walks past his looks, charged with the light of his interest;
she feels his looks on herself inside, she keeps quiet outwardly.

Girando, ella entra por la puerta principal de su casa;
en su mano, la cubeta con la masa cubierta con un trapo.

She is turning, going into the front door of her house;
in her right hand, the dough bucket covered with cloth.

ANY HELP WITH EXPERIMENTAL NOVEL AZUCENA IS APPRECIATED
CORRECTIONS REFINEMENTS OR SUGGESTIONS
EITHER IN THE ENGLISH OR THE SPANISH

3350 views
updated ABR 29, 2009
posted by Martin-Rizzi

5 Answers

0
votes

CHANGES TO MASTER DOCUMENT >>>

Azucena scene 8 '''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

Por la mañana ella va al molino donde el maíz esta convertido en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

Por la mañana, ella va al molino donde se convierte el maíz en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

In morning she goes out to the local mill where the corn is made
into tortilla dough; there are boys along the way outside the mill.

La tortilladora está haciendo ruidos fuertes según gira;
las mujeres del pueblo con sus cubetas esperan su turno.

A tortilla machine is making a loud creaking sound as it revolves;
village girls with buckets are waiting in the line for their turns.

Un joven con una gorra de béisbol la mueve y sonríe a la chica;
ella pretende no haberle visto al chavo ni haberse fijado en él.

A healthy youth in a baseball cap turns his cap and smiles;
she tries to look as if she had not even noticed his gesture.

Ella camina más allá de su mirada, llevándose con ella ese interés;
sigue percibiendo esa mirada dentro de ella, y se mantiene quieta.

She walks past his glances, charged with the light of his interest;
Inside her she feels him looking at her as she maintains her quiet.

Girando, ella entra por la puerta principal de su casa;
en su mano, la cubeta con la masa cubierta con un trapo.

She is turning, going into the front door of her house;
in her right hand, the dough bucket covered with cloth.

THANK YOU; THAT WAS EXTRAORDINARILY HELPFUL,

updated ABR 29, 2009
posted by Martin-Rizzi
0
votes

In morning she goes out to the local mill where the corn is made
into tortilla dough; there are boys [del]were[/del] along the way and outside the mill.

A tortilla machine is making a loud creaking sound as it revolves;
The village girls with buckets are waiting in the line for their turns.

A healthy youth in a baseball cap turns his cap and smiles;
she [del]made [/del]tries **to look as if she had not even** noticed his gesture.

She walks past his gaze, charged with the light of his interest;
Inside, she feels him looking at her[del]self inside[/del], but she [del]keeps [/del] **remains **quiet outwardly.

She is turning, going into the front door of her house;
in her right hand, the dough bucket covered with cloth.

In the first paragraph, I changed -were- to -are- since everything else is present tense.

The fourth section is a bit tricky. I tried to make it flow better without changing it too much. -Looks- is a bit awkward in English. I changed it to gaze, but glance is also good depending on the sense of what you are trying to say.

updated ABR 29, 2009
posted by Kurt-Jaeger
0
votes

New Master Document > Azucena : gracias por ayudarnos con esta novela experimental

Azucena scene 8 ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

Por la mañana ella va al molino donde el maíz esta convertido en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

Por la mañana, ella va al molino donde se convierte el maíz en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

In morning she goes out to the local mill where the corn is made
into tortilla dough; boys were along the way and outside the mill.

La tortilladora está haciendo ruidos fuertes según gira;
las mujeres del pueblo con sus cubetas esperan su turno.

A tortilla machine is making a loud creaking sound as it revolves;
village girls with buckets are waiting in the line for their turns.

Un joven con una gorra de béisbol la mueve y sonríe a la chica;
ella pretende no haberle visto al chavo ni haberse fijado en él.

A healthy youth in a baseball cap turns his cap and smiles;
she made to look as if she had not ever noticed his gesture.

Ella camina más allá de su mirada, llevándose con ella ese interés;
sigue percibiendo esa mirada dentro de ella, y se mantiene quieta.

She walks past his looks, charged with the light of his interest;
she feels his look on herself inside, she maintains herself quiet.

Girando, ella entra por la puerta principal de su casa;
en su mano, la cubeta con la masa cubierta con un trapo.

She is turning, going into the front door of her house;
in her right hand, the dough bucket covered with cloth.

updated ABR 29, 2009
posted by Martin-Rizzi
0
votes

Muchisimas gracias.

updated ABR 29, 2009
posted by Martin-Rizzi
0
votes

Por la mañana ella va al molino donde **se convierte el maíz ** en masa
para tortillas; los muchachos están por el camino y afuera del molino.

La tortilladora está haciendo ruidos fuertes según gira;
las mujeres del pueblo con sus cubetas esperan su turno.

Un joven sano con una gorra de béisbol la mueve y [del]la[/del] sonríe a la chica;
ella pretende no haberle visto** ni haberse fijado** en él.

Ella camina más allá de su mirada, llevándose con ella ese interés;''''?
sigue percibiendo esa mirada dentro de ella, manteniéndose quieta.'''?

No se ve bien lo que quieres decir

Girando, ella entra por la puerta principal de su casa;
en su mano, la cubeta con la masa cubierta con un trapo.

updated ABR 27, 2009
posted by 00494d19
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