HomeQ&APensamientos - Thoughts (60): Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien,...

Pensamientos - Thoughts (60): Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien,...

6
votes

The sentences I am going to post are by my one and only José Luis Alvitekiss, as sarcastic and ironic as usualwink Instead of posting this as a killer thread, I thought I might post one sentence every other day or so.

I would like you to post the translation and your opinion about the sentence. I will correct the translation, and if you post an opinion in Spanish correct major grammar mistakes. You can post in English, but let's get a lot of opinions on these controversial sentences. wink

Please read this message from Alvite himself to all students.

And remember:

Alvite is sarcastic, always pessimistic, nothing is what it looks likeraspberry

alt text

Here goes number 60.

ok, let's see something funny todaywink.

Don't miss this thread!I am posting the chosen answers on Facebook, on Alvite's wall!

Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien, tenía la casa limpia y planchaba a tiempo sus camisas. El tiempo se ha encargado de demostrar que eso era mentira. Los hombres casados no tardan en descubrir que el orden doméstico es enemigo directo de los placeres y que la plancha es un impedimento sexual de primer orden.

3275 views
updated JUL 7, 2010
posted by 00494d19

9 Answers

2
votes

According to the old school of matrimonial doctrine, the married man was happy if his wife cooked well, maintained a clean house, and ironed his shirts on time. Time has demonstrated that this was a lie. Married men are quick to discover that domestic order is a direct enemy of pleasures, and the iron is a sexual impediment of the first order.

La culpa es de los hombres (por supuesto). El trabajo doméstico no es muy sensual, pero pasa lo mismo con todas las cosas cotidianas. Si el hombre quiere disfrutar de los placeres, tiene que seducir a su mujer. Tal vez los hombres necesitan lecciones en el arte de seducción.

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by lkelly
welcome to my threads, kelly, great comment!!! - 00494d19, JUL 5, 2010
jejej, me ha gustado, sobre todo lo de la culpa es de los hombres, por supuesto, lol - 00494d19, JUL 6, 2010
¡Gracias por el voto! - lkelly, JUL 6, 2010
5
votes

Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien, tenía la casa limpia y planchaba a tiempo sus camisas. El tiempo se ha encargado de demostrar que eso era mentira. Los hombres casados no tardan en descubrir que el orden doméstico es enemigo directo de los placeres y que la plancha es un impedimento sexual de primer orden.

According to the old-school doctrine of matrimony, the married man would be happy if his wife would cook well, would keep the house clean, and would iron his shirts on time. Time has made sure to prove this was a lie. Married men are quick to discover that housework is the direct enemy of pleasure, and that the iron is a sexual impediment of the highest order.

Si me lo preguntes a mí, Alvite debe ponerse el delantal de su esposa y lavar los platos mientras que ella le planche sus camisas. Entonces, los deberes se terminan pronto, y habrá tiempo para los amores. Su esposa no estará cansada, y estará más receptiva para hacer el amor.

If you ask me, Alvite should put on his wife's apron and wash the dishes for her while she irons his shirts for him. Then, the chores will be finished early and there will be time for romance. His wife won't be tired, and will be more receptive to making love.

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by Goyo
I love it...love it!!! - --Mariana--, JUL 5, 2010
omg...lol, funny novio - 00494d19, JUL 5, 2010
And a rousing cheer for Señor Goyo....¡Goooooooo Goyoooo! Great response. :-) - Delores--Lindsey, JUL 5, 2010
lol, great translation novio - 00494d19, JUL 6, 2010
4
votes

According to the old school doctrine of matrimony, the married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept a clean house and ironed his shirts.Time has shown that this is a lie.Married men are not slow to discover that domestic order is a direct enemy of pleasures and that the iron is a sexual impediment of the first order.

Quería una esposo, pero no más. Me pregunta dónde está la huella de la plancha en el cuerpo de Luis.Tan pronto como las camisas se planchan se acabo' los fiesta.

I used to want a wife, but no more. My question is where is the iron print on Luis's body.As soon as the shirts are ironed the party is over.

That is my comment.grinó

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by nizhoni1
good one, noz, any comment? IN both languages;) - 00494d19, JUL 4, 2010
sorry, I dont get this either in english or spanish - 00494d19, JUL 6, 2010
3
votes

Under the old school of marriage, the married man was happy if his wife was a good cook, kept the house clean, and ironed his shirts on time. Changing times have demonstrated that this was a lie. The married men soon discover that domestic order is the direct enemy of sexual pleasure and the iron is the leading cause sexual impediment.

It seems like the old school guys wanted a mother who took care of all the things a mother does. But domestic order wasn't what they got married for. Now, since the days of women's liberation, men and women share chores. My men know how to iron. I have not ironed a shirt in years. I rarely cook and my household chores are to a minimum. That keeps me happy and because I am happy, my husband is happy. We have been together over 37 years. Alvites should try it. And lose the iron--I have.

Parece los tipos viejos de la escuela de matrimonia desearon como su madre cuidar de todas las cosas. Pero orden doméstica no fue la única razón lo que se casaron Ahora, desde los días de la liberación de mujeres, los hombres y las mujeres comparten tareas. Mis hombres saben cómo planchar. No he planchado una camisa en años. Cocino raramente y mis quehaceres domésticos están a un mínimo. Eso me mantiene feliz y porque soy feliz, mi marido es feliz. Hemos estado juntos más de 37 años. Alvites debe tratar este. Y pierda a la plancha -- tengo.

updated JUL 7, 2010
edited by sanlee
posted by sanlee
la plancha ? (en vez de hierro?) All sons should be reared as your have been! lol :-) - Delores--Lindsey, JUL 5, 2010
Gracias, Delores. - sanlee, JUL 5, 2010
:-) - Delores--Lindsey, JUL 5, 2010
sandy, you must keep the comments simple. this is impossible to correct, sorry, the idea can be understood, but too many mistakes - 00494d19, JUL 6, 2010
So short and simple, sorry about the next one. - sanlee, JUL 7, 2010
3
votes

According to old school marriage advice, a married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept the house clean and ironed his shirts on time. Time has demonstrated that this was a lie. Married men don't take long to discover that domestic order is the direct enemy of pleasure and the iron is a first class obstacle to sex.

Tiene algo de razón, cuando la mujer está trabajando duramente en la casa (además normalmente tambien fuera de la casa) es posible que dice 'ahora no, por favor, estuve limpiando y planchando y cocinando....' He has hit the nail on the head, if the house is spotless and his dinner is wonderful and his shirt is ready, he may not be tired but I bet his wife is.

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by margaretbl
perfect. no mistakes;) - 00494d19, JUL 6, 2010
2
votes

Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien, tenía la casa limpia y planchaba a tiempo sus camisas. El tiempo se ha encargado de demostrar que eso era mentira. Los hombres casados no tardan en descubrir que el orden doméstico es enemigo directo de los placeres y que la plancha es un impedimento sexual de primer orden.

According to the old-school marriage doctrine, the married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept the house clean, and ironed his shirts on time. Time has shown that this was a lie. Married men soon discover that domestic order is the direct enemy of pleasure and that the iron is a sexual impediment of the first order.

Español: Los Quehaceres domésticos de verdad no los considero juegos amorosos en mi mundo. Si quieres estimular a tu mujer, cocina tú la cena y friega tú los platos. Se te tirará al cuellowink

English: Domestic chores are certainly not considered foreplay in my world. If you want to excite your wife, you serve her dinner and you do the dishes. She'll be all over you.

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by --Mariana--
Igualmente. - Goyo, JUL 5, 2010
Should it be "estimular "a" tu mujer? - Delores--Lindsey, JUL 5, 2010
Great use of the "tú" !! lol :-) - Delores--Lindsey, JUL 5, 2010
jejeje - galsally, JUL 6, 2010
1
vote

According to the marriage doctrine of old school, the married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept a clean house and had his shirts ironed in time. Changing times has proven this to be a lie. It doesn't take long for the married man to realize that domestic order is the direct enemy of a harmonious relationship and the the iron is a sexual impediment of the first order.

The bottom line is: "Not tonight dear, I'm simply too tired". Esta noche no querido, estoy simplemente demasiado cansada.

¿cómo se dice la frase equivalente en español?

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by Yeser007
easy translation but dinner is ready and my wife is calling. I'll be right back with my commentary- I hope - Yeser007, JUL 4, 2010
You better spoon feed her Yesero. And be faster with dinner preparation next time!;-) - nizhoni1, JUL 4, 2010
I did get a few nasty words for not helping out. I was busy here, she should understand that. - Yeser007, JUL 4, 2010
If I were there I would bite you for her - nizhoni1, JUL 4, 2010
Ouch!! - Yeser007, JUL 5, 2010
jejeje - Goyo, JUL 5, 2010
1
vote

According to the old-school doctrine of marriage, the married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept the house clean and ironed his shirts on time. Time has been responsible for demonstrating that this was a lie. Married men very soon find out that domestic order is a direct enemy of pleasure, and the ironing is a sexual impediment of the first order.

Creo que las mujeres saben que la vida no debe ser un ciclo sin fin de tareas monótonas - ¡ mujeres aburridas tienen casas limpias! Más que eso, incluso si las tareas domésticas son tan importantes realmente, no es justo que solo una persona las haga. La injusticia amarga el amor rápido, y sin amor no pueden existir los placeres auténticos, solamente los deberes.

I believe women know that life shouldn't be an endless cycle of monotonous chores - boring women have clean houses! More than this, even if domestic chores truly are that important, it's not fair for only one person to do them. Injustice soon sours love, and without love genuine pleasures can't exist, only duty.

*Edited both English and Spanish to try to make it clearer... just a little stronger, in my opinion.

updated JUL 6, 2010
edited by 00494d19
posted by galsally
Your commentary seems very complicated. How about "sin amor no hay placeres auténticos"? - Goyo, JUL 5, 2010
I just wanted to try to get across that true pleasure within the marriage can't actually exist once love had gone. Your sentence in English doesn't have quite the same meaning to me. What do I know though lol?! ;) - galsally, JUL 6, 2010
1
vote

Según la doctrina matrimonial de la vieja escuela, el hombre casado era feliz si su mujer cocinaba bien, tenía la casa limpia y planchaba a tiempo sus camisas. El tiempo se ha encargado de demostrar que eso era mentira. Los hombres casados no tardan en descubrir que el orden doméstico es enemigo directo de los placeres y que la plancha es un impedimento sexual de primer orden.

According to old school matrimonial doctrine, a married man was happy if his wife cooked well, kept the house clean, and ironed all of his clothes in a timely manner. Time has taken charge of proving that this was a lie. Married men soon discover that domestic order is the direct enemy of pleasure and that ironing is a top-notch sexual impediment.

updated JUL 5, 2010
posted by Delores--Lindsey
SpanishDict is the world's most popular Spanish-English dictionary, translation, and learning website.
© Curiosity Media Inc.
SOCIAL NETWORKS
APPS