How has racism affected you and your loved ones/people you know?

5
votes

I am so sick and tired of people constantly judging me because my husband is of Hispanic/Latino descent!

Yes my husband is a natural born Mexican citizen, and yes he legally lives in America now, and yes we are in love. No he did not marry me to become a legal citizen of the United States of America, nor does he want 15 or 16 kids with me because we would then qualify for Medicare/CHIPS and food stamps!

Just because he has a different skin pigmentation/tone and speaks with an accent (and it is a very sexy accent by the way) does not mean he is any less of a person! My sex life with his is of no business of anyone else, nor is talking or asking about his nether regions a topic I would like to discuss with anyone other than him.

Yes, when I go to the grocery store or out to eat I am going to hold his hand and possibly give him a kiss or two through out the evening; you do not need to stare because yes, I do realize he is Mexican and that he is speaking español to the waiter/check out girl even if they do not understand the language.

Yes, I am very aware of the fact that there is Spanish music playing on my radio and no he is not forcing me to listen to it; I rather enjoy it.

No he is not lazy and uneducated. He works seven days a week, 5 am until 2 pm, plus he works other side jobs when he has a chance.

I hate how people act and treat others because they look different and especially when they know nothing of the person.

Now that I am cutting my rant short, I would like to know how has racism affected you and the ones you know?

4346 views
updated JUN 17, 2010
edited by --Mariana--
posted by KatieLou
I corrected some typos and added paragraph spaces to make this easier to read.

12 Answers

9
votes

My early years were spent with a different accent and religion but I was fortunate to be living mainly with my grandfather ,whenever we were out together if a disparaging remark came our way he would reply with a very strong brogue and a grin as big as Christmas, " thank you for the compliment me darling you've made my day, is there something I can do to make yours" You would be amazed how that defused the situation and made people take stock of their comments . I have always tried to emulate that beautiful man and get in first with a smile and a kind remark , people are more inclined to be friendly when they think there is nothing to fear from you , Too often our own expectations of receiving prejudice and anger will set the tone for what may transpire. If we see and expect evil it may arise.

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by ray76
I love the idea of disarming people with a "smile and a kind remark." Beautiful.
Si, yo tambien.
4
votes

Being accused of being racist because I am white has annoyed me many times.

updated JUN 18, 2010
posted by ian-hill
For real!
2
votes

Well, like Ian-Hill stated "Being accused of being racist because I am white has annoyed me many times.", I feel the same.

updated JUN 18, 2010
posted by princessjane
2
votes

I'm so sorry that you and your husband are subject to this type of bigotry. It hurts and it's just plain wrong.

I'm especially surprised that it happens in Texas were there are many Latinos. You'd think that people would just relax and accept who their neighbors are.

All I can say is this: Please don't let this change who you are or how you act with your husband. This problem is with the racist person and not you two. Enjoy your lives the very best you can and be proud of your family.

Please know that there are other people in the U.S., including me, that support your decision to marry who you love, regardless of racial background.

alt text

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by --Mariana--
1
vote

I'm really sorry Katie, honestly you are doing the right thing by sharing and talking about it. I hate that people are so bigotted and stupid. It is really sad and what can you do, just try to be strong, think to yourself - I'm better off without stupid people in my life and hopefully some day they will change. It is painful and difficult but you are in love and you are making your O W N life so just keep on with it and forget about the others!

updated JUN 18, 2010
posted by margaretbl
1
vote

Well, my husband is mostly French but he has some native (aboriginal) blood. He is quite dark skinned and has often passed as a full blooded native. He thinks that is funny and he is very proud of his heritage. Once in a while, we are not served or treated properly and my husband thinks it is because of his dark skin. It is possible but I always tell him that if people do that because of his skin, then they don't know any better and hopefully they will learn. There are so many lovely people out there who treat everybody like kings no matter what they look like or who they are that it makes up for those who haven't learned to do so...yet.

updated JUN 18, 2010
posted by Lise-Laroche
1
vote

It bothers me too that if I disagree with someone politically, it seems that just because I am white the kneejerk reaction is to call me a racist. I am amazed at how shallow someones mind must be if that is all they can come up with.

On the other hand, I attend a "non-white" church, my wife and I moved our attendance there two years ago. We are two of the three Anglos in this Hispanic congregation. I have been troubled greatly by some of the racist remarks that have been directed to me from my white friends. Discussing this with someone I've known for years, after telling him where we were attending church, he promptly and angrily said "What in the hell did you do that for?"

Then there are the generally calloused remarks of ignorant people that probably don't mean anything and I just take it the wrong way. For example, a guy asked me the other day (when all the protests were going on in Arizona) "why ain't you over there protestin', shouldn't you be?". I asked him why he thought I should be 'over there' protesting, and he really didn't know what to say, except "uh, well, uh, aren't you one of them?"

You gotta' laugh sometimes or your head will explode.

updated JUN 18, 2010
posted by Jack-OBrien
Agreed, thank you for sharing.
1
vote

Muchas cosas nos han pasado asi a mi jefa y yo. Por ejemplo, al venir a este pais (los eua) me vine a los 13 ó 14 y me habian pegado bien fuerte bajo las costillas y me fui al bano sin la energia de respirar. Si te vas en el campo de medicina, creo que ya sabes que es uno de los lugares que no se debe pegar. Otro día estaba levantando pesas uno de mis enemigos se acerco a mi con una pesa de 25 libras y se le dejo de caer a mi y ya que mi mamá decidio que era una escuela bonita antes de reconocer lo malo aunque uno de los mas conocidos del distrito escolar le había dicho que no me quedara bien la preparatoria por el racismo. El primer día querían que comprara mota y les dije que no. Otro día estabamos en la carretera saliendo para rellenar el tanque de gasolina cuando se enojaron mi mamá, mi abuelo y otra señora. La señora estaba manejando otro carro y se empezaron de pelear hasta que se acerco una gasolinera. Cuando mi jefa y la otra señora se bajaron, la güera le dio una cachetada fuerte y la chota fue llamada. Me sorprendi a que la mujer policia (también güera) y el policía (mexicano) no hicieron nada en especial. Solo reportaron lo que paso y le dio una fecha incorrecta a mi mamá. De ahi mi mamá empezo de llenar el tanque. Cuando le llamaron al día del corte se sorprendio a que le dieron la fecha incorrecta. Bueno, muchas cosas nos han pasado.

updated JUN 17, 2010
edited by Rey_Mysterio
posted by Rey_Mysterio
Lo siento mucho por todo lo que te ha pasado y ojalá que algun día la gente tonta sabrán que todos somos iguales bajo el cielo. Es dificil. -
0
votes

I do my best to not allow it to effect me so much, but it gets extremly hard to do especially when I hear it from a family member. For some reason he has decided that he must constantly degrade me and my husband because he is Mexican. Just a few weeks ago he asked me "When are you and him going to have a baby?" To which my husband said "When God says that it is time." My brother then looks at me and says "Well if he can't give you a kid, f**k his brother. They're both Mexican, so it would be the same wont it?"

I have since cut my brother out of my life because that was the last straw in a long line of cruel remarks (some of which I cannot believe he had the nerve to say). I am not giving up on my husband or our marrage, but I am at a loss as of what to do anymore when it comes to cruel people such as him.

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by KatieLou
All i can say is **wow**!!!
0
votes

These things never happened to me... But my neighbour was killed in Bombay during the Babri Mosque Riot in 1992. I still don't understand why many people don't see others as one of them.

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by Vaanz
Maybe some day.
0
votes

Sorry these things have happened to you or anyone. From personal experience I know these things can happen even if you have the friendliest demeanor.I can only pray that you can form an attitude that helps you hold up under the stress of these kinds of interactions.

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by nizhoni1
0
votes

Lo siento, KatieLou. This is just awful. My sister-in-law is Salvadoran, and she did not get her citizenship until sometime after she and my brother were married. Fortunately, I have not experienced this kind of bigotry. I have dated a couple Latino men, one was born here and is bilingual. The other is of Peruvian descent and speaks English with an accent, and I agree, it is a sexy accent! Both of them speak both languages fluently. I think Latino guys are just plain hot! Fuego!

updated JUN 17, 2010
posted by chica_rica