Try to find out what this means: ¿Quieres que te lo cuente otra vez? -Jorge Berlanga
I have chosen this text this week as this will definitely kill you!! 
You will have to investigate a lot and find out who is who...very difficult.
One clue, Antonio Ozores is one of Spain's best comedians, and he was especially known ( he is retired) for his long apparently disjointed sentences, jumping from one topic to the next, making the whole thing difficult to understand even for natives.
Let's see what you can do
Hoy he visto por la calle a Antonio Ozores y me han entrado ganas de que me hiciera una crónica de actualidad que pudiera ser así:
«Verás, la prensa de Barcelona le ha echado una pitada al TC, que es como el árbitro que se hace el remolón, así que el Barça F.C. ha llamado a Messi para que arregle el embrollo y si está malito que su mamá haga un duelo de sopicaldos con la mamá de Ronaldo en el palco, a ver si Joan Laporta consigue hacerse independiente de Florentino Pérez para que cada uno haga vida por su lado, a ser posible en países distintos, como Don Jaime Marichalar, que le quitan el De y le sacan tarjeta roja, que como él dice es la confirmación de una tragedia, como si pierdes por goleada y pierdes el título, porque fíjate lo que son las incursiones en falta en el área que el mozarrón de adopción Thyssen le ponen de caco y medio porque unas cámaras le han grabado bajando de un coche en casa de su madre, qué bien sale Tita en las ‘‘celebrities’’ de Muchachada nuit, que hay que ver esta familia que parece que se pone enferma si no sale en el ‘‘¡Hola!’’, que no saben que las fotos luego van al pan como la de la hija de Zapatero que la han secuestrado de Tuenti porque es que hay que saber posar, que en eso las esposas del Real Madrid ganan a las del Barça y si las ramblas no pasan por la Castellana, Cádiz puede ser Pamplona para que corran en moto Tom Cruise y Cameroz Díaz, y en el Rastrillo todo sigue igual.¿Quieres que te lo cuente otra vez? Pues te cuento un secreto: también tendremos partido del siglo el año que viene».
22 Answers
I think that this is probably my last attempt...I feel like l have been walking backwards through mud, but here goes:
I ran into Antonio Ozores while I was out in the streets today, and I started looking forward to him possibly making me a report of the latest news that might go something like this:
“You see, the news jockeys of the Barcelona press have sounded the alarm (blown the whistle) to the Constitutional Courts. That is like the goldbricking referee who shirks his responsibility; therefore, F.C. Barcelona has called upon the services of Messi to clean up this mess, and if he is not feeling up to snuff (healthy/well), his mother and Ronaldo’s mother can duel it out in the stands with a cook off to see whose soup truly is the meatiest, to see if Joan Laporta might gain separation from (get out from beneath the shadow of) Florentino Perez so that each one get settled into their own place, if possible in different countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar, because they are stripping him of his “De” and handing him a red card (taking out of the game - a reference to his expulsion from the royal family due to divorce that seems to use a double entendre with the sports term "red card" which implies being thrown out of the game), because like he says, it's a testament to the tragedy. It's like losing by a landslide and then losing the title, because take a look at all the foul play (the incursion of fouls) on the field that made the stout adopted young Thyssen such a first rate thief because some cameras recorded him getting out of a car at his mother’s house; Tita looks fantastic in the “Celebrities” of Muchachada nuit, because one has to see this family that seems to get sick any time they don't make it into the weekly issue of “¡Hola!,” because they don’t know that the pictures are then sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they ripped off of Tuenti because one just has to know how to pose, because in that, the wives of Real Madrid have one up on the wives of F.C. Barcelona and if Barcelona (or the boulevards of Barcelona - las ramblas) doesn’t pass for Madrid (for the wide tree lined avenue of Madrid - Paseo de la Castellana), Cádiz might be Pamplona so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz might run with the bulls on motorcycles, and in el Rastrillo the song remains the same. Do you want me to tell you again? Well, I am telling you a secret: We will also have the match of the century next year.”
Great job Chaparrito....but I think that I am throwing in the towel on this one. I know when I'm licked...the second I scrape myself up off of the canvas, that is....Best of luck!!!
OK I have revised it..................................................
I ran into Antonio Ozores while I was out in the streets today, and I am starting to get the urge to give a report of current events that might go a little something like this:
“You see, the news jockeys of the Barcelona press have sounded the alarm (blown the whistle) to the Constitutional Courts. That is like the goldbricking referee who shirks his responsibility; therefore, F.C. Barcelona has called upon the services of Messi to clean up this mess, and if he is not feeling up to snuff (healthy/well), his mother and Ronaldo’s mother can duel it out in the stands with a cook off to see whose soup truly is the meatiest, to see if Joan Laporta might gain separation from (get out from beneath the shadow of) Florentino Perez so that each one get settled into their own place, if possible in different countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar, who they are stripping of his “De” and handing him a red card, that, like he says, is a testament to the tragedy, which is like losing by a landslide and then losing the title, because take a look at all the foul play (the incursion of fouls) on the field that made the stout adopted young Thyssen such a first rate thief because some cameras recorded him getting out of a car at his mother’s house; Tita looks fantastic in the “Celebrities” of Muchachada nuit, that it’s necessary to see this family that seems to get sick any time they don't make it into the weekly issue of “¡Hola!,” that don’t know that the pictures are then sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they ripped off of Tuenti because it’s just necessary to know how to pose, that in that the wives of Real Madrid have one up on the wives of F.C. Barcelona and if Barcelona (or the boulevards of Barcelona - las ramblas) doesn’t pass for Madrid (for the wide tree lined avenue of Madrid - Paseo de la Castellana), Cádiz might be Pamplona so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz might run with the bulls on motorcycles, and in el Rastrillo the song remains the same. Do you want me to tell you again? Well, I am telling you a secret: We will also have the match of the century next year.”
he was especially known ( he is retired) for his long apparently disjointed sentences, jumping from one topic to the next
I'm glad that you put this in as a hint or else I never would have been able to make heads nor tails of this.
Heidita,
So are the lines you made bold the ones that still need work?
Also, what about my two questions:
1) Should the first word be "Verás" or "Veraz"? and 2) Is there some significance to the fact that Cameron's name was spelled "Cameroz"?
Es el cuarto de los seis hijos del conde de Ripalda, Amalio de Marichalar y Bruguera, comandante de artillería, que falleció en 1979, y de Concepción Sáenz de Tejada y Fernández de Bobadilla. De aquí su pertenencia al Solar de Tejada, situado en la Sierra de Cameros, La Rioja. Por su parte, pertenece a la rama isabelina de la Casa de Marichalar. Su abuelo, Luis de Marichalar y Monreal, vizconde de Eza, fue ministro del Ejército y Marina
Not really, he is a son of a noble family anyway, but many newspapers now rid him of the de...not justified in my opinion. I am not so very up-to-date on that, but as all the family has the de I guess he has it too, nothing to do with his duke title.
No hay hombres valientes en este mundo....
Eddy, Izan is tuning in any moment now so let¡s see if you can have another look at it
Truly, Barcelona’s press has cocked a snoot at the constitutional court saying that the referee was lazy, so Barca FC has called on Messi in order to sort out the tangle and if he doesn’t feel up to it then his mother should challenge Ronaldo’s mother to a penalty shoot out. Lets see if Joan Laporta and Florentino Pérez can make a life for themselves in a different country like Don Jaime Marichalar, who they removed almost the same way as giving him a red card, which is like losing heavily and then losing the title, because look at the fouls in the penalty area that Thyssen, the strong young adopted fellow, has made, they make him out to be a thief because some cameras have filmed him under a car at his mothers house just like they filmed Tita in the “celebrities” de Muchachada de nuit just as a family is being forgotten if it doesn´t appear in “Hola”!, that they do not know that the photos are being sold like those of Zapatero´s daughter which were stolen from Tuenti because it is that one must know how to pose, that is the wives of Real Madrid win over the wives of Barca and if the avenues can be mistaken as Castillian, Cadiz can be Pamplona, so that if Tom Cruise’s and Cameron Diaz’s motorbikes can enter the flea market everything is normal. Do you want me to go over it again? Well I am telling you this in secret, we will have a party next year.
Ok, Eddy, you must try again
Hint: la Castellana, la Rambla
I am sorry, Eddy, this is very confusing, jeje, I must say, many Spaniards would be confused by the original too, mind you.
too difficult, I admit, I thought it was very funny, but the names are unknown, mostly and this was too much to ask.
Thanks for having a look at it, everybody, I am preparing something new
Heidi
This has been almost incomprehensible. Here is a quick stab at it. It is NOT literal, just an interpretation.
Truly, Barcelona’s press has cocked a snoot at the constitutional court saying that the referee was lazy, so Barca FC has called on Messi in order to sort out the tangle and if he doesn’t feel up to it then his mother should challenge Ronaldo’s mother to a penalty shoot out. Lets see if Joan Laporta and Florentino Pérez can make a life for themselves in a different country like Don Jaime Marichalar, who they removed almost the same way as giving him a red card, which is like losing heavily and then losing the title, because look at the fouls in the penalty area that Thyssen, the strong young adopted fellow, has made, they make him out to be a thief because some cameras have filmed him under a car at his mothers house just like they filmed Tita in the “celebrities” de Muchachada de nuit just as a family is being forgotten if it doesn´t appear in “Hola”!, that they do not know that the photos are being sold like those of Zapatero´s daughter which were stolen from Tuenti because it is that one must know how to pose, that is the wives of Real Madrid win over the wives of Barca and if the avenues can be mistaken as Castillian, Cadiz can be Pamplona, so that if Tom Cruise’s and Cameron Diaz’s motorbikes can enter the flea market everything is normal. Do you want me to go over it again? Well I am telling you this in secret, we will have a party next year.
Chaparrito and Izan, as usual you have stunned me, Eddy threw the towel some time ago
, but you finally did it!!
Chapparri, I was about to take yours....but I think Izan's getting the idea of the losing the title and championship wordgame, convinced me. In any case, if this could be done, I would have taken both of you as "winners".
Great job! Both if you did an awesome job at investigating all those names and places, really impressive.
I have nothing to add, this was an excellent job by both of you
Today I saw Antonio Ozores on the street and I was eager for him to spin me a tale of current events that might go like this:-excellent
Well, let me tell ya , the press in Barcelona have taken a drag of the TC, they’re like a lazy referee acting only when they have to, so the Barca FC has called on Messi to sort out the mess and if he is not up to it, then his mom ought to duel it out in a soup cook-off with Ronaldo’s mom, let’s see if Joan Laporta is able to be independent from Florentino Perez so that each one may live their own life, if that’s --- possible in separate countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar from whom the ‘De’ and was taken and he was tossed out of the game like he says its just proof of the tragedy that this is like not only suffered a humiliating loss, but losing the championship/title (wordgame here with his title of Duke and the championship) because just look at all the fouls made in the area by the adopted young strapping Thyssen, who was called a street thief when some cameras filmed him getting out of a car at his mom’s house, how great Tita looked among the celebrities of Muchachada nuit, this family is something else, it appears that they will get sick if they don’t come out in every issue of ¡Hola!, and they don’t know that the photos are later sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they seized from Tuenti because you have to know how to pose, in this the wives of Real Madrid win out over those of el Barca and if Las Ramblas don’t reach Castellena then the running of the bulls can be in Cadiz so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz may ride motorcycles and in the “el Rastrillo” market, where royalty are seen, nothing has changed. Want me to relate it again? Well I’ll tell you a secret: We are going to have another match of the century next year!
I will look at your last draws after the puente
waiting...
Nos vamos a NY por ocho días. Nos vemos entonces.
jejej, I will look at your last draws after the puente...meanwhile, do make a search for Antonio Ozores, he is one of the greatest!This video will show you ...and letmetelya...if you understand HIM you really speak Spanish!!
(nobody does, don't worry)
Ayayay! I can't think straight, see straight, think straight, wait I said that... You may have thrown in the towel Izan, but I don't think I ever got up from the corner after the first round!
Today I saw Antonio Ozores on the street and I was eager for him to spin me a tale of current events that might go like this:
Well, let me tell ya, the press in Barcelona have taken a drag of the TC, they’re like a lazy referee acting only when they have to, so the Barca FC has called on Messi to sort out the mess and if he is not up to it, then his mom ought to duel it out in a soup cook-off with Ronaldo’s mom, let’s see if Joan Laporta is able to be independent from Florentino Perez so that each one may live their own life, if that’s even possible in separate countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar from whom the ‘De’ and was taken and he was tossed out of the game like he says its just proof of the tragedy that he not only suffered a humiliating loss, but lost the championship also, because just look at all the fouls made in the area of the adopted young strapping Thyssen, he stole the show (took attention away from other things and directed it to himself) when some cameras filmed him getting out of a car at his mom’s house, how great Tita looked among the celebrities of Muchachada nuit, this family is something else, it appears that they will get sick if they don’t come out in every issue of ¡Hola!, and they don’t know that the photos are later sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they seized from Tuenti because you have to know how to pose, in this the wives of Real Madrid win out over those of el Barca and if Las Ramblas don’t reach Castellena then the running of the bulls can be in Cadiz so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz may ride motorcycles and in the “el Rastrillo” market, where royalty are seen, nothing has changed. Want me to relate it again? Well I’ll tell you a secret: We are going to have the match of the century next year!
All this makes me feel like I did those first few months of getting into Spanish; dazed and confused. (What fun!)
And the way Heidita has been sparingly doling out little scraps of hints. I feel like the little Charles Dickens boy "Please sir, may I have some more?" Please, Heidita? Help? Ya no puedo.
I ran into Antonio Ozores while I was out in the streets today, and I am starting to get the urge to give a report of current events that might go a little something like this:
“Get a load of this, the news jockeys of the Barcelona press have sounded the alarm (blown the whistle) to the Constitutional Courts. That is like the goldbricking referee who shirks his responsibility; therefore, F.C. Barcelona has called upon the services of Messi to clean up this mess, and if he is not feeling up to snuff (healthy/well), his mother and Ronaldo’s mother can duel it out in the stands with a cook off to see whose soup truly is the meatiest, to see if Joan Laporta might gain separation from (get out from beneath the shadow of) Florentino Perez so that each one get settled into their own place, if possible in different countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar, who they are stripping of his “De” and handing him a red card, that, like he says, is a testament to the tragedy, which is like losing by a landslide and then losing the title, because take a look at all the foul play (the incursion of fouls) on the field that made the stout adopted young Thyssen such a first rate thief because some cameras recorded him getting out of a car at his mother’s house; Tita looks fantastic in the “Celebrities” of Muchachada nuit, that it’s necessary to see this family that-this sentence sounds really weird to me...very confusing, ------- seems to get sick any time it doesn’t make it into the weekly issue of “¡Hola!,” that don’t know that the pictures are then sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they ripped off of Tuenti because it’s just necessary to know how to pose, that in that the wives of Real Madrid have one up on the wives of F.C. Barcelona and if Barcelona (or the boulevards of Barcelona - las ramblas) doesn’t pass for Madrid (for the wide tree lined avenue of Madrid - Paseo de la Castellana), Cádiz might be Pamplona so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz might run with the bulls on motorcycles, and in el Rastrillo the song remains the same. Do you want me to tell you again? Well, I am telling you a secret: We will also have the game---match!!--- of the century next year.”
this certainly sounds really good Izan...let me have a look at chaparri's
Have a go at all those thats in the text...consider that this guy is telling it all without a full stop...all those thats are very colloquial. Let's see if you can improve that.
You re not getting the beginning, I wonder why
de que me hiciera
Who????????
Today I saw Antonio Ozores on the street and I got the notion to to relate a current event that might be as follows:
To tell you the truth----good----or: let me tell ya...-----, the press in Barcelona have taken a drag of the TC, which is like a referee arbitrator -- shirking his responsibility ----look at this correction, so the Barca FC has called on Messi to sort out the mess and if he is not up to it, then his mom ought to have a soup cook-off duel in the penalty box with Ronaldo’s mom, let’s see if Joan Laporta is able to be independent from Florentino Perez so that each one may live their own life, if that’s even possible from separate countries, like Don Jaime Marichalar from whom the ‘De’ and was taken and he was tossed out of the game---------
EXCELENTE!!----, like he says it confirms the tragedy, as though he not only royally lost but also lost the championship-very close-------, because just look at what are foul incursions in the area that the adopted young strapping Thyssen is just stole the show ???? when some cameras filmed him getting out of a car at his mom’s house, how great Tita looked among the celebrities of Muchachada nuit, you must see this family, it appears that they will get sick if they don’t come out in every issue of ¡Hola!,---great!!---- and they don’t know that the photos are later sold like those of Zapatero’s daughter that they seized from Tuenti because you have to know how to pose, in this the wives of Real Madrid win out over those of el Barca and if Las Ramblas don’t reach Castellena then the running of the bulls can be in Cadiz ----yes, this is essentially it!!----so that Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz may ride motorcycles and in the market--which one??---- nothing has changed. Want me to relate it again? Well I’ll tell you a secret: We will also have the match of the century next year.
oooookkkkkkk, jeje, so that was "here comes nothing"
Well, if this is nothing...please send me the something right away!! lol
Nobody is getting the beginning...look at my notes to Izan.
