Los policía simpatizantes y el capitán pidieron un abogado: corrections? improvements? either language

Question

Scene 195 ************************************************

Los policía simpatizantes y el capitán pidieron un abogado:

una cara nueva cuñada de uno de los hombres en la fuerza.

Sympathetic policemen and the captain send for an attorney:

a fresh faced sister-in-law of one of the men on the force.

Ella es el tipo sensible y afectuoso, toma a Azucena;

saca a los policía y le dice: "yo soy licensiada Elisa"

She is the sensitive and caring type, taking to Azucena;

clears out the cops, saying to her: "i am attorney Elisa"

"¿querida niña" dice "¿CÓMO por todos cielos entraste aquí?

"debemos ciertamente sacarte" "no, no te preocupes querida"

"dear child” she says “HOW in heavens did you get in here?

“we must certainly get you out;" "now don’t you worry, dear”

Ella se acerca y abraza a la niña del cabello enredado:

"déjamelo a mí, manejaremos esto de una manera ordenada”

She moves over and hugs the tangle-haired child and says:

“leave it to me, we will undertake this in an orderly way"

Los ojos anchos hondos oscuros de la niña observan a la abogada;

ella es quieta, mientras las palabras de la licenciada la buscan.

The wide deep dark eyes of the girl child regard the lawyer;

she is quiet on the surface, as the lady’s words sought her.

Adentro, Azucena se aleja, afuera Azucena sonríe tímidamente;

se siente todo bien, ahora sí su corazón es el centro de atención.

Inwardly, Azucena shies away, outwardly Azucena shyly smiles;

she is feeling pretty well now that her heart is the center of attention.

Answer 1

El capitán y los policías que simpatizaban con ella le solicitaron un abogado:

¿??una cara nueva???, la cuñada de uno de los hombres en la fuerza.

The captain and the policemen that sympathized with her requested an attorney:

???a new face???, sister-in-law of one of the men on the force.

Ella es de carácter sensible y afectuoso, ¿??toma a Azucena???;

desaloja a los policías del lugar (salón) y le dice: "Yo soy la licenciada Elisa"

She is the sensitive and caring type, ???taking to Azucena???;

removing the cops from the ???, she says to her: "I am Elisa, your attorney "

“leave it to me, we will deal with this in an orderly way"

Los largos e insondables ojos oscuros de la niña observan a la abogada;

ella se mantiene quieta, mientras las palabras de la licenciada buscan su mirada.

The wide and deep dark eyes of the girl child scrutinize the lawyer;

"She remains quietly composed, the lawyer watches for a tell-tale look from Azucena."

Internamente, Azucena se recata, en su exterior sonríe tímidamente;

se siente bastante bien ya que ahora su corazón es el centro de atención.

Inwardly, Azucena shies away, outwardly she smiles timidly;

she is feeling pretty well now that her heart is the center of attention.

• thank you very much, i made numerous changes to the master text - Martin-Rizzi Nov 12, 2009

Answer 2

Los policía simpatizantes y el capitán pidieron un abogado:

una cara nueva cuñada de uno de los hombres en la fuerza.

Sympathetic policemen and the captain send for an attorney:

a fresh faced sister-in-law of one of the men on the force.

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How would you re-write these lines to make the action clearer?

Answer 3

Hi Martin: For the first line I already gave you my interpretation. It's the second line I don't understand at all.